I Rub My Duckie Bondage provided for review by Vibrator.com

Mimi

There are two things I think I should mention right away –

1. I’m not really into animal shaped, cutesy toys.

2. It takes a lot to please my clit, especially with the medication I’ve been taking recently.

This is the perspective that I am coming from, yet I still wanted an I Rub My Duckie of my own. Of course, we needed the Bondage version, the second release of the Collector’s Series. With its lace up “leather” corset , red ball gag, tattoo, and miniature handcuffs, it’s really cute and fun. If someone were to see it through the clear shower doors, they probably would just assume that it’s another silly thing in our apartment full of many silly things.

The Bondage Duckie is easy to hold, even while wet, and most of its use, for me, has occurred as a warm up in the shower. There is only one level of vibration and it is centered mostly in the duck body, felt the strongest through the tail end. The vibration feels very good and can cover a broad area, but I have not been able to have an orgasm. Like I said, it serves as a good warm up toy that I can leave in the shower and smirk at from time to time.

The only outright annoyances come from the battery compartment and the method by which you can turn the vibration on or off. I didn’t mind the battery compartment requiring the use of a screwdriver because, honestly, if they die on me I’ll switch to my hand or get out of the shower to use a different toy. However, if the idea of being interrupted at all while masturbating is unsettling to you, then you should probably go for a different vibrator. In order to turn the vibrator on or off, you have to squeeze the Bondage Duckie at the base of the neck. You know how there are stuffed animals in grocery stores and such that sing songs or speak, and all you need to do is “PRESS HERE”? You know how sometimes the pressing is more like “SQUEEZE AS HARD AS YOU CAN IN THIS GENERAL AREA AND HOPE FOR THE BEST”? Yeah…. So we understand each other.

No Trash!

These complaints, in my opinion, are minor. Does anyone buy vibrators like these actually expecting to get off effectively? I don’t know. Considering the way my body functions, I wouldn’t. The Bondage Duckie is a luxury toy in the sense that it is enjoyable and certainly a fun item to have in your collection, but it’s completely non-essential.

Joseph

Ok…so it’s a rubber duckie (usually associated with toddlers) that is covered in bondage gear (only associated with toddlers if you like federal penitentiaries) that you are meant to vibrate your vagina with. That’s not weird. Not at all.

Of course, I am being obtuse. This is one of those discreet sex toys meant to be kept in plain site without raising more than an eyebrow. It does a good job of that.

Beyond that, it is pretty easy to use from the partner’s perspective. It is easy to hold and the vibration is fairly easy to direct. It still weirds me out a little bit, though….

“You like that duckie? Yeah, you like it?” See? Weird.

I don’t suppose I should be too weirded out though, many sex toys resemble baby toys.

One more thing. It can never be completely sterilized so no sharing unless you’re fluid bonded.

The Naked Truth

Aesthetics:

Intensity:

Volume:

Ease of Cleaning:

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Ahem…

Basic Essentials Softee provided for review by Eden Fantasys

Joseph

Marketing Guy 1:
What do chicks love?

Marketing Guy 2:
My Dick!

MG 1 & 2:
WOOOOOAAAAAAHHHHH!

MG 1:
No seriously, though…they love pink…and….and….

MG 2:
My Dick!

MG 1:
Textures! Let’s make a vibrator that is pink and covered in texture of some kind.

MG 2:
But let’s make the texture removable so I can put it on My Dick!

MG 1:
Um..sure…

Expert tip for guys — don’t turn the sheath inside out and try to use it as a sleeve. Just don’t.

And they made it in China cause it is cheaper and put “SOLD AS NOVELTY ONLY…This product is intended for use as a novelty product only. For external use only.” Yep. It is a vibrating dildo that is not meant for internal use.

Ok, so that endearing disclaimer aside, let’s talk material. The outer sheath is made of TPR which is pretty easy to clean (assuming it doesn’t have a million little bumps all over it) but can not be disinfected. The vibrator itself is ABS, a mix between elstomer, rubber and hard plastic. Same story there, easily cleaned but impossible to disinfect. It is, however recyclable (probably not with the motor in it, though).

The Basic Essentials Softee takes one AA battery and has an adjustable speed dial at the base to control the speed of vibration. It is water proof and oh-so-pink.

Don’t buy it.

Mimi

When EdenFantasys offered the Basic Essentials Softee to us for review, I accepted the offer thinking our experience could go one of two ways –

1. It would be a simple toy that is surprisingly exciting and novel in its sensation.
2. It would be uncomfortable and oh so ho-hum.

After getting its soft, nubbed pink body out of the packaging, I immediately tested the dial-control for vibration range, intensity, and ease of use. I found it promising. Plus, there’s something about the physical sensation of turning a dial that I really enjoy. Don’t try to make sense of it. I’m just mentioning this because the dial turning may be the thing I like most about this toy.

(Oh yeah, it’s like that.)

Joseph removed the TPR shell – the nubby sleeve which reminds me of art history freshman year – exposing a much more simplistic, “traditional” vibrator beneath. Still pink. Still could go either way.

I could see being excited about the idea of having two toys in one, but really this is more like getting no toys at all. And then crying.

Why? Well….

Most of the intensity is in the “head”, which is smooth, not nubbed like the rest of it. I guessed the point of the nubbiness then was to stimulate the vulva in a new way. Guessed wrong. It feels like a lubricated gelatin mace is groping me.

Although the vibration did feel good, it wasn’t really strong enough to push me over the edge. So it might be good for some warm-up foreplay or orgasm control, but otherwise it’s a big fat disappointment.

While it was inside me I kept thinking, “This might feel good without those nubs.” It wasn’t painful, per se. It was just uncomfortable. Yes, I know – you can remove the nubby texture. The problem with the intensity is still present.

Since the Basic Essentials Softee has a removable sleeve and it’s waterproof, cleaning is easier than it would be if… say… there were no water in the world anywhere ever and you were dead. Okay, I’m exaggerating. However, it’s no exaggeration that cleaning the TPR nubby sleeve is a pain in the ass. In fact, considering the Basic Essentials Softee cannot be sterilized in any way, you may want to go ahead and use a condom with each use anyway. Voila! Clean-up is easier.

Or buying a different toy altogether. That might be easier.

The Naked Truth

Aesthetics:

Intensity:

Volume:

Ease of Cleaning:

Functionality:

Overall:

(Bad) Dream of the Sex Toy Reviewer’s wife

Vibratex’s Tumbelina provided for review by Babeland

Joseph

The Thumbelina is what is commonly referred to as a rabbit or dual stimulation vibe. It’s pretty obvious why. They are designed with dual stimulation in mind; Internal (often G-spot) stimulation and external clitoral. The rabbit name comes from the fact that the clitoral tickler resembles the ears of a rabbit. Sometimes it is even in the shape of a rabbit.

This one in particular is made with G-spot stimulation in mind. It has a bulbous head that is motorized to rotate at a variable speed. The clitoral tickler also has a variable speed motor. In theory, this should stimulate the G-spot and the clitoris with minimal work on your part. I don’t know about you, but I am digging the trend in female sex toys to be more and more automated. Several of them require little to no effort. You just plug them in, turn them on, lay back and enjoy. The downside to toys that do all the work for you is that they are not much fun for partnered use. For example, the Thumbelina is designed in such a way that it is not necessary to move it once you find the sweet spot and dial it up. Not really much for a second person to do except enjoy the show. Don’t get me wrong, watching a beautiful woman pleasure herself is nothing to complain about, but there is always something to be said for teamwork. Before you send me an email about it, I know that it is a MASTURBATION toy and so it is fine for it to be catered to solo use. But…we’re a married couple and we’re going to make observations like that. Deal.

Thinner than most of the dual vibes that I’ve seen, the Thumbelina is 3-3/4” x 1-1/4” and made of transparent purple elastomer. That, of course, means that it cannot be sterilized so you must use a condom with it if sharing with someone you are not fluid bonded with. I imagine that could be somewhat tricky due to the bullet that juts out of the side of this thing.

It is powered by 4 AAA batteries and goes WHUANG-WHUANG-WHUANG when it is activated. Not only are its gyrations somewhat comical, but they are LOUD too. And don’t think that having it in your vag will help. Doesn’t muffle the sound at all.

Mimi

I did not like my first experience with a rabbit vibrator (Rockin’ Robin), in fact I hated it, but I decided not long after beginning our review site that I’d keep trying them to see if one could do it for me. The Thumbelina is not the one, if such a rabbit vibrator exists.

Simply, it does not hit my g-spot unless I tilt it in such a way that my clit is neglected and vice versa for my clit. The clit normally wins because it feels better and I’m more likely to orgasm, but even still the vibration lacks enough oomph to push me beyond warm up. And obviously why bother with a toy designed to stimulate my g-spot and my clit to only (sort of) stimulate one of them? To that, I say pshaw.

Although it would be a fantastic luxury to be able to stimulate both with only one toy, it seems like a stretch in my mind. My body has special, specific needs for specific areas, shaped and sometimes inhibited by my own desires. Many women that I know function the same way. It’s one of the reasons why we buy bikinis as separates. Or why buying jeans is NOT an easy task.

The best thing going for the Thumbelina is the vibration and rotation control panel. It’s very easy to maneuver while using the toy. It may be the only stand out thing about it, other than the unnecessarily loud noises it makes. As Joseph mentioned, the toy is loud – loud enough that you should not use it while someone is in the next room unless you have loud music playing. There is some bumpy texture on the surface of the Thumbelina, but it does little to make the toy more appealing.

Basically, I would not recommend the Thumbelina to anyone. Sad, but true.

The Naked Truth:

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Versatility:

Ease of cleaning:

Overall:

The only good thing about this toy is that you can make it rave.