CrashPadSeries.com Volume 3

Crashbox

Crashpadseries.com Volume 3 provided by Blowfish

Joseph

In case you don’t know, The Crash Pad Series is based upon Shine Louise Houston’s 2006 debut film of the same name. The crash pad is a place where dykes and femmes alike can go to have uninhibited sex. Unfortunately I have not seen the The Crash Pad itself, but if it is anything like the series based on it, it is HOT.

The DVD that Blowfish sent us is a collection of episodes from the website. From the looks of it, that’s how these collections are offered; four or five episodes per DVD. Volume three features some performers that are quickly becoming favorites of mine: Dallas, Shawn (Syd Blakovich), Dylan Ryan, Princess Donna, Jake, Lorelei Lee, Billy Jack Gunn, Paul Gunn, Red, and Javier.

If you’ve been reading the site or following Houston’s work, you’ll recognize several of those names. Houston has a tendency to use familiar performers (I don’t really feel comfortable calling them actors because they are not acting in even the traditional porn sense. The people in Houston’s films are not pretending to have hot, enjoyable sex – they are) in her productions, which is fine since she has such stellar performers.

This particular installation of the Crash Pad Series involves deep throating, squirting, the fabulous Hitachi Magic Wand, and lots of authentic queer sex. I don’t have any complaints about this collection. None. I personally was not turned on by the scene between “cousins” Billy Jack Gunn and Paul Gunn because my sexual tendencies are unwaveringly hetero and those two look too much like biological men to do anything for me.

The particular copy that was sent to us has some issues with the sound being out of sync in a couple of spots. It was minimal in the beginning but by the last scene (Red and Javier) it was completely incongruous. I sent Blowfish and email to see if this was an artistic choice of Houston’s that I didn’t get or a simple defect but at the time of this writing, I have received no response.

If you don’t want to wait for a DVD to be shipped to you just go to http://www.crashpadseries.com where you can view any of the episodes (there are more online than offered on the individual DVDs.

Mimi

I have a lot of respect for Shine Louise Houston’s work so when it came time to watch CrashPadSeries.com Volume 3, I was really excited and my expectations were high, which is a pleasant shift from the usual. (I’m not a huge fan of porn, which is often boring, stifling regurgitations of sexuality and beauty to me. At best, it’s a good laugh.) I was not disappointed. I enjoyed every scene of this DVD, which I have not been able to say about any other porn thus far.

Whoa shit.
Whoa shit, indeed.

In episode 16, Dylan Ryan enters the crash pad, but instead of trying to join Dallas and Shawn, she hides nearby. While Shawn ties Dallas up to a chair, sucks Dallas’ strap-on cock, and then proceeds to fuck herself silly, Dylan Ryan is sneaking glances, biting her lip, obviously aroused. Eventually Shawn and Dallas move to the bed and continue to pleasure themselves and each other. I really enjoyed the chemistry between these two. They appeared to have a lot of fun.

In episode 17, Dylan Ryan comes out of hiding after Shawn and Dallas leave. She throws herself down on the bed, smiling and burying her face into the vibrant red pillows and sheets. Watching her writhe and inhale the scent of Shawn and Dallas’ sexual encounter is really arousing, perhaps even more so than when she actually strips and masturbates. It may be more of a personal thing than anything else, but entering the mindset of the voyeur, entering the fantasy of unknown bodies and personalities – the way she pulled the sheet between her legs, thrust her hips toward the bed, inhaled deeply, and smiled so big – is a huge turn-on.

That’s what I need. Honest arousal. Honest reaction.

Joseph didn’t seem to enjoy Episode 15 with Billy Jack and Paul quite as much, for reasons rather obvious, and we ended up talking more throughout its duration. We talked a lot about gender identification, bisexuality, pansexuality, and considered our relative ignorance when it comes to various lifestyles. For example, I trip over terminology quite a lot because I want to be respectful. It’s hard when everyone has personal preferences that may not be clear. Houston’s porn films are especially challenging, and I think she would probably smile if she heard me say so.

Despite the distraction of our talk, I found this scene just as arousing as the others. Aside from a little initial awkwardness, both performers seemed to forget that a camera was even there. They just did their thing and their thing was hot. (Also, how great is it that Paul Gunn has a “pussyboy” tattoo?)

In episode 21, Lorelei Lee enters the crash pad to find Donna and Jake ready to fuck, and she’s not so sure at first, but quickly convinced! (If only I had the powers of persuasion that Donna has…) This part of the scene was really annoying because the sound was a bit off; however, the three of them really made up for it. Lorelei Lee, god bless her, didn’t make constant obnoxious goat noises like she did in Superfreak. Jake was quiet, reserved, and yet really involved in significant ways. Donna, of course, dominated most of the actions in the scene. All three of them seemed really into it (when Lorelei Lee and Donna are making prolonged eye contact later in the scene, it’s pretty intense), yet joked and laughed occasionally.

Last but not least, episode 19 with Red and Javier was, sadly, hard to watch because of the sound disturbances. And you can watch it muted, like we did, but…. it’s not the same. Red and Javier are really sexy performers – I liked watching them even without sound. Red can wear a strap-on and bend me over anytime she’d like.

As always with Houston’s films, she places emphasis on safer sex practices, which I find really appealing in porn. Also, despite the reoccurrence of performers, there’s something really “fresh” about their presence. Perhaps it’s the scenery, the camera angles, the tone, the personal interactions between performers. You just know that it’s going to be sexy and authentic, yet light-hearted and fun. Perfect.

The Naked Truth:

Aesthetics: ★★★★★

Level of Arousal: ★★★★★

Educational Value: N/A

Storyline: ★★★☆☆

Overall: ★★★★★

Key,yo,Key

There is no Crash Pad where we live, but we do have a shed…

Under the Bed Restraint System from Sportsheets

utbrs-package1 utbrs-package2

Front                                                                    Back

Under the Bed Restraint System provided by Babeland

Mimi

Sportsheets’ Under the Bed Restraint System is difficult to write about because it’s a simple design that functions exactly as it appears on the packaging. Four cuffs are attached to four 60-inch restraint straps, connected together by a 60-inch strap that goes underneath your mattress length-wise. The cuffs have velco enclosures and the straps can be adjusted to offer the non-restrained person more control over the restrained person’s position.

I’m using these terms instead of ‘Master’, ‘Domme’, or ‘sub’ because although I think this is an excellent product, it’s probably not particularly thrilling for individuals that are more demanding of their bondage scenes. The fact that the non-restrained person can free his/herself has both positive and negative implications – 1.) it can help build trust and comfort for individuals unfamiliar with bondage and 2.) it can disrupt the true feeling of being at the “mercy” of another person. And as I’m hoping you are aware, a lot of what happens with bondage is mental. So it’s kind of a casual, beginner, or mostly-vanilla-but-trying-some-kink toy.

However, with some other toys and some creativity there is room for expansion, which is something that will always earn a toy some gold stars in my book. For example, if the cuffs start to bother you because of how soft they feel or because they don’t lock, you can purchase harder, more bad ass, locking cuffs to replace the old cuffs. Or you could use the Restraint System as a base for more extensive bondage play. Last night he used the cuffs at the head of our bed to restrain my feet so I was vag and ass out exposed, and in a brief moment of distracted thought, I considered the myriad of ways that I could be tortured and tormented, or how my arms could possibly be tied to my legs or my chest. Throw in some rope, a paddle, an ice cube, or butt plug and you are golden. So many possibilities.

That’s really the beauty of this product. It’s simplistic, a common denominator from which you can fine tune your own brand of kink. And shouldn’t that be the point?

him-ubrs

her-ubrs

Joseph

I have no background in BDSM of any kind. I didn’t even really know what the letters stood for until recently and I still forget sometimes. Since I’ve been with Mimi, I have been ever so slowly exploring the world of rope, blindfolds, nipple clamps, and the blurring of the fine line between pleasure and pain.

I think that my level of experience with bondage is exactly right for this product. Don’t get me wrong, this is a bondage product; it is just one that is best for light bondage or people that are new to it, not entirely comfortable with heavier bondage play, or just want to feel kinky without the heightened level of trust and inherent danger that comes with some BDSM acts.

Sportsheets’ Under the Bed Restraint System is the very definition of straight forward. I mean, look at what they called it. There is no question about what this product is or does. It is a restraint system. That goes under the bed.

Unlike the Astrea II and communism, this is a very simple concept that functions beautifully in reality. I was able to install (read: put under the mattress) in less than five minutes and can restrain her at any time in a matter of seconds because it is always there. Although we don’t care to bother with concealing it, if one chooses, it is also very easy to keep out of sight but within reach. The straps and cuffs can just tuck away behind the headboard and your comforter can cover the ones at the bottom.

The cuffs are attached to the straps with clips that can be opened and moved with ease. This is nice because you can clip the cuffs together to restrain your playmate off the bed, and then reattach the cuffs to the straps when it is time to move into the bedroom.

My only reservation about wholeheartedly endorsing this product is the packaging. All of Sportsheets’ packaging and marketing materials that I’ve seen are exactly the kind of air-brushed, over stylized, scantily clad model propaganda that bothers me about the adult industry.

With that said, all and all, this is a brilliantly executed product. It is simple, well designed and versatile.

nikki-ubrs
“Excuse me, your kink is showing.”

The Naked Truth:

Intensity: N/A

Volume: N/A

Design: ★★★★★

Versatility: ★★★★★

Ease of cleaning: ★★★★★

Overall: ★★★★★



Babeland Wishlist!

So Babeland has this excellent Summer of Love Contest going on and we never pass up the opportunity for free sex toys. Here is our wishlist:

G Curve Dildo – $60
http://store.babeland.com/dildos-silicone/g-curve-dildo
We like that it’s made of silicone, will hit my g-spot, and it’s harnessable so it meets possible, potential needs. – Her

We-Vibe – $130
http://store.babeland.com/vibrators-electric/We-vibe
Rechargeable, waterproof, versatile, easy to clean – it’s a totally bad ass toy! – Him & Her

Aneros Prostate Stimulator MGX – $58
http://store.babeland.com/safe-sex-sexual-health/aneros-prostate-stimulator
We’re interested in trying out prostate stimulation, and this toy appears to be good for beginners. – Him

Candy Apple Wrist Restraints – $62
http://store.babeland.com/bdsm-top-picks/candy-apple-wrist-restraints
These pretty red cuffs can be used with our under-the-bed restraints and will make it easier to take the party elsewhere if desired. – Her

Kookie Riding Crop – $18
http://store.babeland.com/bdsm-top-picks/kookie-riding-crop
Riding crops are quite sexy and we’ve never gotten around to using one, so this toy seems perfect to break us in. – Her

Nipplettes Vibrating Clamps (Black) – $36
http://store.babeland.com/bdsm-clamps/nipplettes-vibrating-clamps
We already love “normal” clamps and it’d be fun to try out a vibrating pair! – Her

Babelube Original 16oz. – $20
http://store.babeland.com/safe-sex-lubes/babelube
We ran out and need more of this excellent water-based, glycerin-free lube. – Him

I Rub My Duckie -$20
http://store.babeland.com/vibrators-discreet/ducky
It’s a vibrator shaped like a rubber duckie – of course we want it. – Him

Shunga Chocolate Body Paint – $15
http://store.babeland.com/sexy-gifts-top-pics/shunga-chocolate-body-paint
Two of the greatest things in life are sex and chocolate, which this product seems to bring together beautifully. – Him

Penis Cupcake Pan – $15
http://store.babeland.com/bachelorette-gifts-adult-novelty-toys/penis-cupcake-pan
I’ve always wanted to eat dick, but I’m not gay. – Him

Cuff Connector – $3.50
http://store.babeland.com/bdsm-equipment/cuff-connector
It would go with our Candy Apple Wrist Restraints. – Him

Edible Pasties – $5
http://store.babeland.com/bachelorette-gifts-adult-novelty-toys/edible-pasties
I want to wear these cute and silly little hearts to my bachelorette party. – Her

Smart Balls – $28
http://store.babeland.com/safe-sex-sexual-health/smart-balls
After reading more about the benefits of toning PC muscles, such as the possibility of more intense orgasms, I’m really interested in trying out this toy. – Her

Babeland Massage Candle Gift Pack – $25
http://store.babeland.com/sensual-massage/babeland-massage-candle-gift-pack
This seems like a trick to make me give her massages. – Him