Divine Vibrator provided by Babeland

Joseph

The Divine Vibe by Doc. Johnson is somewhat less than divine. Or at least, that what it seems like from my perspective.

That’s the thing, my perspective, as one without a vagina is somewhat limited about things like g-spot stimulators and vibrators meant to be inserted into said non-existent vagina. Therefore, I’ll just break down the dimensions and logistics of this bad mama jama.

The Divine Vibe is an 8” x 1 ¾” variable speed vibrator that has a curvature intended to stimulate the G-spot internally. It is made of ABS (the same stuff as Lego blocks) plastic which is a durable and recyclable plastic made comprised of a mix of elastomer, rubber, and hard plastic. ABS will dissolve when exposed to acetone, so no harsh cleaners.

The vibe comes in two colors, “Yin and Yang” (read: Black and White to the non-marketing goon) and is packaged in a mostly clear plastic container that says “Harmony” for reasons we cannot discern.  It takes two AAA batteries which are not included and has a single button to control the speeds (low, medium, high). I feel kind of silly because it seems like I should be able to figure this out, but there is a symbol on the box and the bottom to the vibe that confuses me. It is a trashcan with a big X over it. I guess this means that this toy must not be thrown away…so….what should you do with it when you are finished getting in sync with your inner core? This? Really, click on that link. It is worth it.

As far as using it on someone, it is pretty easy on the hand. The big, bulbous base makes it very easy to grip and maneuver and the ABS keeps the temp nice and slightly cool.

Because if you don’t “close cap tightly” bad things could happen.

Mimi

Let me just start by saying that I have an odd relationship with g-spot vibrating toys. I tend to dislike them. (I’ll write more about this for our upcoming Lelo Gigi review.) Still, I am open to experimentation and Doc. Johnson’s Divine Vibe could be used in various other ways, so I decided to give it a try.

I received the Yin (black) Doc. Johnson’s Divine Vibe and after pressing the button down toward the battery compartment three times to feel the three different settings, I was pretty convinced that I might actually have a clitoral orgasm with this toy. The low and middle setting are worthy yet the highest setting is the one I used the most.

It didn’t happen. I tried on several occasions, and although it felt good, it didn’t feel close to good enough. I ended up pulling out my Hitachi every time.

We decided that Joseph should use it on me while I use the Hitachi to see how it feels inside me as well as handled by another person.

That was a whole lot of vibrating.

Due to the width and shape of the Divine Vibe, I felt rather “full” while it was inside me. Eventually I had a clitoral orgasm, which felt good. It was a slow burn.

Then I went to wash the Divine Vibe and realized there is a tiny crevice between the “head” of the vibrator and those three ridges in the center. This tiny crevice is a collector, and it is hard to clean. At least it’s waterproof and you can submerge and scrub to your heart’s content. Maybe you don’t care about something as tiny as that crevice.

Maybe you should go masturbate with some Legos then. At least you could build cool shit afterwards.

As I mentioned, it is waterproof and it functions really well as a vibrator that lives in the bathroom and is used on my clit occasionally in the shower as a warm-up. And it does feel great in that capacity. It teases while stimulating because you need more, and that’s where other toys or partners come in. Hopefully.

Divine? More like Pretty Good to Have Around.

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Jesus: Yo, B! Who the hell is this lumpy fool?

Buddha: I dunno, but he a jive-ass sucka!

Mimi

I purchased njoy’s Fun Wand almost two years ago to accompany my Hitachi Magic Wand from Babeland after searching online for the right dildo. My specifications were for the toy to be metal, glass, or silicone; double sided; curved for g-spot stimulation; and slender.

Medical-grade stainless steel, 1” at its widest, curved perfectly for g-spot stimulation, and double sided with one end beaded – the Fun Wand seemed perfect. The graduated beads were a selling point for me because I wanted to have the option of that sensation. If you’ve read my other reviews, you know that I prefer versatile toys.

When I first held it in my hands I remember thinking that 11 ounces was heavier than I thought, but the weight felt “right”. Not heavy enough to be scary, not light enough to incite apathy. Very satisfying. I also enjoyed how responsive the Fun Wand is to temperature. (It seems redundant to mention temperature play with a metal toy, but you know, if you’ve never experimented with metal before, it might not occur to you right away.) I like a slight pinch of cold steel before insertion, but if that’s really not your thing, the Fun Wand warms up quickly in your hands or under warm water.

Initially masturbating with the Fun Wand was really awkward, in fact I experienced a “SHIT I just spent $88 on a toy I don’t like” moment. Reasons: 1.) super smoothness + lube = one slippery object, 2.) it’s 7-1/2” long, which after insertion leaves you few inches leftover to maneuver. However, these complications are easily remedied with practice and not overdoing it with the lubrication.

Alas, I took a deep breath and kept at it, despite slippage that disrupted my rhythm and my chi. There’s a payoff to determination. It’s a big wet one commonly referred to as female ejaculation. I’ll admit that I don’t actually care a whole lot about squirting. I’ve had many really intense, amazing orgasms that did not come with a wet dramatic finish.  I’ve also squirted before when it seemed entirely unwarranted. I didn’t even feel an orgasm coming! It’s exciting in a way, amusing, and inconvenient to varying degrees (you will need to change your sheets, maybe flip the mattress, etc.) – it’s not the measuring stick for a good time. So if you don’t do it right away or even within a few weeks of using this product like I did, don’t stress about it.

You will have a good time. You will have fun. They changed the name of this product from Saturn Wand to Fun Wand. Why? Because it’s a lot of damn fun. (Actually, I’m guessing.)

The Fun Wand is also great for anal play, especially for beginners. The beads are small (again, 1” at it’s largest), smooth, and easy to clean. I can’t personally vouch for this, but it seems like men would enjoy it, too.

Fun, sexy, versatile, high quality – could you ask for a better dildo?

Joseph

We affectionately refer to this toy as “the spaceship” because of its sleek, futuristic style. I guess it was the second sex toy I had ever seen up close before and it did a lot to sell me on the use of sex toys. This is not something that is sketchy or questionable. The words “dong” and “ultra-erotic” belong nowhere near this toy.

It comes in a very sturdy black box emblazed with the brand name njoy in silver. Inside the box is a form fitted resting place for the Fun Wand covered by a soft fuchsia fabric. Much like a really fancy coffin….

Anyway, morbid comparisons aside, the packaging alone speaks of quality and care rather than marketing and lowest common denominator.  The medical grade shiny steel toy itself is seamless and has a very satisfying weight to it. The design makes it clear that it was created to be multi-purpose. One end is wider and curved in a way that immediately pops “g-spot” into one’s mind and the other end has graduated beads that look very much like a set of anal beads. I wonder why.

Although I have not personally experimented with it yet, it seems like it could certainly be used for men or women. The experience that I do have with it is helping Mimi use it when my fingers are too sore to do the job. I’ll be honest, it is not comfortable to use on someone else. The graduated beads do not lend themselves to being held at that angle and the steel is not forgiving. Having said that, I have a special place in my heart for anything that makes Mimi squirm the way that this toy does.

If you are looking for a toy that will bring a little respectability to your toy chest and last forever without costing several hundred dollars, the Fun Wand is a very attractive option.

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“I’m givin’ her all I’ve got, Captain!”

Flexi Felix provided for us by Babeland

Joseph

The cute, 100% silicone caterpillar toy is by far the most comfortable thing that I have ever inserted into my anus. Granted, it is the only thing I have ever inserted into my anus but after having a look at some of the other toys on the market, I know the Flexi Felix made the process much easier than it could have been.

I had an understandable amount of anxiety about crossing that puckered line. There are all kinds of things for a heterosexual male in American society to worry about when considering anal play that is anything other than straight male on female. Stigmas abound. Our society does not encourage sexual acts that put men in an exposed or subordinate position. Men’s sexuality is about power and control. This message is constantly reinforced in both direct and indirect ways. I think that may be part of America’s problem with male homosexuality.

Ok, I’m done ranting about our society’s fucked up standards about sex. Perhaps one day we’ll make a whole post about it but for now, back to the Felix.

The Flexi Felix is a 12” (10” insertable length) set of anal beads manufactured by Fun Factory. It is 100% silky soft silicone and has a head with a smirking caterpillar face at its base. It is cute but not cutesy. It is by far the most approachable thing designed to go in one’s ass that I have ever seen.

Insertion was easy and comfortable with the exception of the stem in between the beads being a little too thin to get a good grip on. Fully inserted it is unobtrusive…almost to a fault. I couldn’t really feel it, which seems to defeat the purpose. It would, however make it easy to wear in all day which I could see as having some “I’m so naughty” appeal.

Removal during orgasm was not an altogether pleasant experience for me, but I don’t blame the product for that. I blame my inexperience with anal play. It is still a strange and kind of uncomfortable feeling and that prevents me from fully enjoying it.

Cleaning the Felix is really simple. Just drop it in a pot of boiling water for 10 to 15 minutes and you’re good to go.

As a genuine beginner, I cannot give this product a better endorsement. It is easy, approachable, and it has a good attitude!

Would you be smirking if you had Felix’s job?

Mimi

The Flexi Felix is my first anal bead type toy and with its 3/4″ to 1″ diameter beads, it’s very approachable for first-timers. Even if you’re entirely new to anal play, the Flexi Felix is as friendly to your ass as it looks. And it does look friendly, doesn’t it? Such a cute specimen of anal love. Offered in bright pink, light blue, and black silicone, the updated stylishness of the Flexi Felix adds to its approachability and ease of use. You just know when you’re holding it in your hands that this isn’t just another sketchy looking “string” of beads that you have to entrust to your tender and questionable anal orifice. Oh no. This is better, much better.

The silicone is incredibly smooth and relatively easy to insert, given how flexible it is (they don’t call it “Flexi” for nothin’), so you can play alone or with a partner without much – if any – discomfort or bent over frustration. Really. I had the whole strand in, tucked the caterpillar head under my panties, zipped up my shorts, washed my hands, and came back out into the living room within just a few minutes. You won’t even need to pause your movie, or worry about your tea getting cold.

Left in for a few hours, Flexi Felix feels pretty good. It creates a whole other meaning in my mind to the phrase, “dirty little secret”. And I am certainly a girl who likes her secrets. However, it is the experience of this reviewer that the Flexi Felix is hands down at its absolute best when pulled out during orgasm. This toy is perfect when you want a little extra OMFG without a whole lot of effort, time, or lube.

As you can imagine, this “easy as cake” quality can become rather… boring. Don’t get me wrong. I appreciate “easy” when I come across it, which is why I still enjoy the Flexi Felix and will happily let it occupy a space in my toy box. Still, I will always favor a more versatile toy over a one hit wonder. It’s just my nature. If you function similarly, you might want to shop around a bit. (I know that Babeland in particular offers some other anal toys that are challenging/fun/practical.)

And to top it all off, the Flexi Felix is that, since it is silicone, you can disinfect it by boiling it for 10-15 minutes, putting it in the top rack of your dishwasher, or with soap and water. (I prefer boiling.) Remember to use a water-based lubricant with this toy. It will last you a long time if you take care of it.

Unwinding after a long day of putting up with other people’s shit.

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