Aslan Silicone Ball Gag provided for review by Babeland

Kayla

The Silicone Ball Gag from Babeland is an amazing ball gag. I’ve been searching for a long time to attempt to find a ball gag that was both comfortable and the right size, and it’s been a difficult search. Many people seem to be able to use the 2” ball on most gags, but Jor just didn’t have the mouth size for it, so it made most traditional gags unusable for us. Until we found this one. (dun dun dunnnn)

The ball aspect itself is made completely from silicone which makes it safe for teeth because its squishy and has give. The leather of the gag is nicely treated, and it’s comfortably slick and smooth. This ball gag will fit sixteen to twenty-three inch heads, and the ball gag itself is just a little under two inches. The buckle isn’t locking, but it shouldn’t be; it’s a safety hazard.

Putting it onto another person is extremely easy. All I have to do is just allow Jor to keep the ball gag in his mouth, go around to his backside, then pull the straps up against the back of his head and tighten it. If you both are beginners, let it hang a little loose (so if need be, your partner can spit it out.) If you want “real” (what is real play anyway?) play, tighten it so your partner can’t spit it out.

Safety wise, don’t be stupid and use this for more than thirty minutes. Future jaw problems are not sexy. Agree upon a safeword before you shove a gag in your partner’s mouth – pissed off partners aren’t sexy either. If you have any jaw problems, be careful during use of a ball gag.

Cleaning it is extremely easy. Because each side of the ball gag provides a snap button, you can unsnap the ball gag from the rest of the leather and just clean it by itself. Warm water and antibacterial soap will clean the ball up just fine. Avoid getting the soap or water on the leather. If you want to clean the leather, there is special leather cleaner that will assist with that.

Jor

I really liked playing with the Silicone Ball Gag. It was a lot different from Ball Gags I’ve tried in the past. Normally they were alway too big for me and hurt my jaw. But this one was the perfect size for me. It wasn’t marketed as a training ball gag, but it definitely helps and I love having a ball gag I can finally keep on for more than a few minutes.

As for how it feels, well it feels basically like a ball gag. You’re going to drool, it’s going to be icky and humiliating, but it’s a ball gag. What are you expecting? So if you’re looking for something comfortable, I advise against sticking a gag in your mouth. As for the leather strap and stuff, they don’t bother me and they feel nice enough. Honestly I don’t even really notice they’re there. So I wouldn’t call it “uncomfortable” in a bad way, but it is a ball gag.

One nice thing about this ball gag, besides its size, is that it is really soft and squishy. I can easily dig my teeth into it and it doesn’t hurt at all. In fact it’s kind of fun going “nom nom nom” on a giant ball, but that’s besides the point. My point is basically it’s easy on the mouth and teeth. The Silicone Ball Gag, from my experiences so far, is basically a great ball gag for beginners. It’s user friendly, comfortable and fun to use, or at least the BDSM equivalents of those words.

The Naked Truth

Aesthetics: 4 out of 5 stars

Functionality: 5 out of 5 stars

Craftsmanship: 5 out of 5 stars

Ease of Installation: 4 out of 5 stars

Discretion: 3 out of 5 stars

Safety: 4 out of 5 stars

Overall: 5 out of 5 stars

Getting Undressed is better when you tell everyone on the internet!

LELO Ella provided for review by Babeland

Mimi

The LELO Ella is a coveted toy for many people, and understandably, considering it feels as luxurious as it looks (very) and it is designed to deliver g-spot orgasms. Pure silicone, velvety purple, and 7″ x 1-1/2″ at widest point.  It’s light and slightly flexible, yet sturdy enough to handle vigorous thrusting. Sounds fantastic, right? Keep reading.

I have had g-spot orgasms, both with and without ejaculation (or squirting), with the use of njoy’s Fun Wand or LELO’s Gigi and a vibrator on my clit. Both of the curved g-spot toys I just listed are harder and less flexible than the Ella, but they are just as smooth, well-made, and fantastic. However, a lot of effort is required for me and I even give my g-spot a “head start” over the clitoral stimulation. The Ella is even more difficult for me, which I was a bit surprised by.

The handle is long enough to maneuver and there are no buttons to worry about (like the Gigi), but there’s something about it’s shape and silicone handle that makes it hard to hold and thrust. My fingers slide out of place and it’s very upsetting. I find myself having to pause to re-adjust my fingers, which is totally not what I want to be doing when I’m getting close to exploding all over my sheets.

And perhaps I prefer the harder and less flexible feel of those other toys. Still, that’s personal preference, and the Ella is shaped perfectly for g-spot stimulation. That counts the most.

If you have difficulty with reaching a g-spot orgasm, don’t stress yourself out over it. It takes time and practice. And sometimes it just doesn’t happen. The point is to have a good time.

The great thing about silicone, in case you didn’t know, is that it can be sterilized after use by boiling it for about 10 minutes or putting it in the dishwasher without soap. This means you can share it with other people.

Joseph

Well, usually I sheepishly describe the materials and cleaning precautions with a vaginal insertion toy. You know, because I don’t have a vagina. No matter what you heard, I really don’t have one.

But this time Mimi covered all of that as well as the vagina factor (that would be a good band name) so I’ll just have to talk about my experiences using it on her.

The Ella is significantly better to use than the Gigi from my perspective because the handle is longer and there is not a big button right where my thumb should be. I can hold on and thrust really well and for much longer quite comfortably.

The Naked Truth

Aesthetics: 5 out of 5 stars

Ease of Cleaning: 5 out of 5 stars

Functionality: 4 out of 5 stars

Overall: 4.5 out of 5 stars

Getting Undressed is better when you tell everyone on the internet!

I have been reading your review/blog site and is quite interesting.  I have a question. What would you recommend: pjur MY sexual enhancers, K-Y INTENSE Arousal Gel for Her and Durex Play Utopia Female Arousal Gel?

I have used Durex and I really really like it, but I am not sure what [to] buy next–KY or pjur.  I have used for years pjur original and eros and they are both fantastic.

Thanks!  And I am sorry if you don’t usually answer this kind of emails.  It can end up being a post

Warm regards,

C

Dear C,

First of all, thanks for reading our blog! We appreciate it a lot. You can email me or Joseph anytime with questions. This is becoming a post ’cause no one else asked me anything. Yay!

Secondly, onto the lube. I have never used a “sexual enhancement”-esque lube other than the flavored sort, so I can’t speak about any of your options from experience. Pjur is a good brand for lube, so of the three I would probably choose that one on account of familiarity and pre-established trust. I’ve used the brands KY and Durex in the past, but they were not particularly great for me.

However, something to bear in mind with lube is that everyone’s body functions differently and thus has different requirements. I don’t self-lubricate very well, so my body needs a lube that lasts long without tackiness. Plus, a few of my favourite toys are silicone, so I can’t use silicone-based lube with them and must be mindful of that when purchasing lube.  Maybe those aren’t concerns of yours, but I’m sure there are other priorities you have for lube.

Maximus, Liquid Silk, Slippery Stuff Gel, pjur, and Babeland are brands I have used in the past with noteworthy results (i.e., I can actually remember them).

Good luck with your lube shopping! If you have any other questions, feel free to send me another email or respond directly in this post. Whatever your preference.

- Mimi

Getting Undressed is better when you tell everyone on the internet!

Orchid G + Smart Girl’s Guide to the G-spot provided for review by Babeland

Zinaida

To begin with, I just want to say that on a whole, I haven’t been entirely interested in G-spot toys, or actually, the G-spot. This could be for a couple of reasons: 1) I’m fairly a newbie when it comes to sex, so I’m still completely enamored by the clit, or 2) While I know a ton about the G-spot, I’ve never really been pushed to try it—sometimes I have a hard time changing from something that’s tried and true. So, I was pretty excited to receive the Orchid G and The Smart Girl’s Guide to G-spot combo.

Opening the package for the vibrator though, the only thing I could think was, “Shit, this thing is huge!” I’m not gonna lie, I was rather intimidated by it. Its widest point is 1-3/8”, and it’s barely smaller than a large egg, as you can tell by the picture. The vibrations in this baby are hella strong though. You turn on the vibrator by twisting the bottom, and it increases in intensity the more you twist. The Orchid G on low is comparable to the Babeland Bullet on high. When V was using it for clit stimulation, I was straddling her shin, and I could feel the vibrations from her leg bone (which could make for some interesting play).

Overall though, I couldn’t get the vibe in. Ok, ok—I didn’t even TRY to get the vibe in. As I was trying and it got close, I tensed up so much I knew it was going to be hopeless. Wondering if other people had the same problem, I went on the Babeland site and looked at reviews for the Orchid G, and sure enough there were a small handful of people who said that it was too big for insertion, very hard (it’s made out of plastic), or awkward. It is waterproof though, which is always great bonus in a toy.

The partner to this combo, The Smart Girl’s Guide to the G-spot by Violet Blue, is an extremely educational book. For those who don’t know a lot about the G-spot and would like to, this book would be a great place to start. She outlines female anatomy, finding the G-spot and what to do with it, tips for talking about it with a partner, and female ejaculation. The book is an easy read, and it’s nice having lots of G-spot information in one place. The very end also has an index of online shopping, resources, recommended reading, and safe sex information.

However, I did have a couple of problems with the book:

1. There are four porn interludes written by erotica writer Alison Tyler. Now, I could go off on how these stories were filled with your classic cheesy porn type of writing, or how some of them gave off an anti-feminist air, but I won’t. I will say, however, that these stories seemed like propaganda. They were simply a reiteration in story form of what Violet Blue had already written, and that plus the bad writing were off-putting to me.

2. Toward the end of the book, the G-spot almost disappears completely. Instead, the writing begins to focus on anal sex, clit stimulation, and BDSM. But, more on that later.

Overall, I do think that this is a good combo set. The vibrator seems great; my body just needs a smaller one. The book is very informative, but I felt like by the end of it I should have wanted to explore G-spot stimulation. Instead, I’m still not that interested in trying it out yet.

Vita

Before I say anything else, I think Babeland has a great idea in selling these two together; I’m all for combo sets that save you money. However, this one, to me, had two major flaws.

As a girl who only wears junior size tampons, I was a little startled by the Orchid G. Things never look quite as big online as they do in real life. This was the cause of Flaw #1: the Orchid G proved too big for little me, even with lube. As a clitoral vibrator, it’s great; it’s actually the strongest of all my toys (yes, everything I own is still battery-operated), and that was a fun discovery. Its Very Big Head felt great against me, and the twist at the bottom to control it was convenient enough. That same Very Big Head, though, has yet to fit where the book said I should put it. This seems like a shame, since the combination of strong vibrations and Very Big Head promises to be delightful…one day.

Now, onto the book. I’ve heard about it before but never had the chance to read it; g-spots intrigue me but I’m mostly an external stimulation kind of girl. Nonetheless, I found the first half of the book full of information that made me a little bit more curious than I had been. The writing style occasionally can be too cutesy for my taste, but the background, anatomy lesson, and general informative tidbits were useful and interesting. I have two major qualms with this book, however, that I’m adding up to make Flaw #2.

First, an entire chapter as well as parts of other chapters felt completely unnecessary and unrelated, like Z mentioned. Chapter 6, entitled “faster, deeper, more!”, was supposedly about ways to enhance g-spot play; specifically, she went into detail about anal sex, oral sex, and power play. And she did indeed go into detail: she covered the basics of anal, plugged her book The Ultimate Guide to Cunnilingus, and gave a variety of S/M options that seemed likely to scare off a beginner. In each section was a brief reference to how playing with the g-spot was great in addition to these tactics, but it felt tacked on, and I didn’t need pages on “Getting Started with Anal Penetration” to tell me that.

Second, there was erotica. Don’t get me wrong – I love erotica, when it’s well written and I’m in the perfect mood to enjoy it. But when I’m halfway through learning about my g-spot and I’m hesitant about the entire ordeal, a short story that feels like thinly veiled propaganda (to steal Z’s analogy) isn’t going to do anybody any good. I know it’s impossible to please everyone when it comes to erotica, but I feel like the chances aren’t in Violet Blue’s favor. Not only did the stories come across as didactic and/or forced, but they were unnecessary. I almost didn’t read the last two, but I’m glad I did, because they introduced me to great phrases like “to collect a fresh dose of your honeyed juices” and “I’m going to take you even further—to a tropical island called ‘coming together’”—not really what I cared about in an otherwise educational read.

All that said, there was a good deal of information in the book, and I wouldn’t by any means discount it. I wasn’t as huge a fan as I expected to be, but it’s certainly not a bad book. I love the idea of packaging it together with a vibrator to make the exploration that Violet Blue talks about at length convenient and easy, but at least for us, this combination didn’t do it. Now, if there were vibrator or size options for the combo, that could come closer to doing the trick. In the meantime, though, I’m quickly becoming a fan of the Orchid G for clit stimulation.

The Naked Truth

Orchid G

Aesthetics: 4 out of 5 stars

Intensity: 4 out of 5 stars

Volume: 3.5 out of 5 stars

Ease of Cleaning: 5 out of 5 stars

Functionality: 5 out of 5 stars (well, for external use)

Overall: 4 out of 5 stars

The Smart Girl’s Guide to the G-spot

Aesthetics: 5 out of 5 stars

Educational Value: 5 out of 5 stars

Quality of Writing: 3 out of 5 stars

Entertainment Value: 2 out of 5 stars

Overall: 3.5 out of 5 stars

Awww, what a cute pussy.

Getting Undressed is better when you tell everyone on the internet!

Bend over Beginner Kit provided for review by Babeland

Joseph

We live in a very strange culture. On one hand there is sex in nearly every advertising message that we see. And boy do we see them. It is estimated the average American is confronted with 3,000 advertising messages in some form per day.

Then on the other hand, our national stance on sex is the equivalent of sticking your fingers in your ears and shouting LALALLALALLALA! I am referring, of course, to the fact that a huge number of schools in this nation still teach abstinence only sex education. Because if you don’t teach kids about sex, they won’t have it!

This type of ignorance mixed with over stimulation often gives rise to confusing feelings and the proliferation of misguided concepts about sex and sexuality. Don’t tell me that you have never heard the ludicrous assertions “If I have sex on my period, I can’t get pregnant” or “Well, a blowjob is not sex so you can’t catch anything from giving one“ or the slightly more articulated “If a man receives anal sex, that makes him a fag.”

I grew up in this environment (and I imagine most of you did, too) and while I was able to get my hands on good solid information about sex and sexuality, I am still aware of the general climate in which I live and operate.

It is with that in mind that I announce our first ever review series: The Bend over Beginner kit from Tantus. The reason that we have chosen to do this in a series is because pegging is a very sensitive subject both where we live and at large. We are hoping that by going slowly with this subject, we can cover it more completely and address some of the issues that people have with it.

In this installation we are simply going to talk about the product itself.

The kit is two 100% silicone dildos (7/8″ x 4-1/2″ and 1-1/4″ x 5-1/2″), an adjustable (up to 60″) velvet harness with a pocket for the included bullet vibrator. It also has an interchangeable O-ring in case you want to use larger dildos.

As always with Tantus, the quality of all the materials seems very high and everything is easily cleanable. The harness is machine washable and the dildos can be sanitized via boiling or washing with bleach.

The next installment will cover how the harness fits, warm up and the use of the smaller dildos.

Do YOU have any experience pegging or being pegged? Share your experience with us. Either leave a comment or send us an email. Whichever you are more comfortable with.

Getting Undressed is better when you tell everyone on the internet!

Moregasm provided for review by Babeland

Although I’ve been a visitor to the Babeland website for years and have seen pictures of their stores, I’ve never actually been to one. I suspect reading their new book Moregasm is much like walking through the Babeland door, looking around, and having helpful employees answer all of your questions. In terms of design and photography, Moregasm follows an aesthetic that is hip, fun, colourful, and easy to read. It’s 800 times less embarrassing than sneaking a peak at your mom’s copy of some such sex guide made in the 60’s with two skinny, monster bushy lookin’ people “making love” on the cover. It’s also much safer than trusting some random sex blogger on the internet. (Ha!)

Claire Cavanah and Rachel Venning, the founders of Babeland, enlisted the help of Jessica Vitkus (writer), Sarah Small (photographer), and Headcase Design (duh) to bring Moregasm together. All involved deserve a big pat on the back. Not only is the book very informative – even for bold sexual adventurers who have a big cowboy belt buckle proclaiming, “been there, fucked that” – it also navigates the sticky terrain of not being too heavily biased toward Babeland products really well. They do an excellent job of presenting information in an exciting, yet easy to understand and comforting way. I wish this book had been there for me as a pre-teen. I probably would have still made some bad decisions, but I’d have this snazzy sex book to show off to my girlfriends!

Yeeeeeeaaaaaahhhhhh

As you may be able to tell from the pictures and my tone, it is precisely the youthful “hip-ness” of this book that may make older people feel silly or out of place when reading it. I’m not saying they wouldn’t find any of its information useful. My grandmother revealed to me a few months ago that until then my grandfather had never removed her bra. It’s a small example, but you get my point. I would urge any older man or woman reading this book to try seeing it as a new adventure, and not their sad attempt at being young and cool. (Please don’t torture yourself like that. If you don’t believe me because I’m too damn young to know any better, head over to Joan Price’s blog. She’s a smart lady.)

The only disappointment was in “The Satisfied Customer: The Lube Guide” section. It gives a brief introduction to lubricants – not mentioning SILICONE lube, by the way – and then offers three examples of Babeland water-based lubricants. In case you didn’t know, there are many, many, many different kinds of lube. Some are better than others, some are more expensive than others. It depends on your needs. When I was open to those two pages, I felt like I was reading a Babeland advertisement, not a guide to lubricant. Why did they not show an extensive variety as they did for other products like vibrators and anal toys? I don’t know. Since they did suggest a wider variety of products later in the book, I don’t see any reason to take huge issue with it. It’s just a little baffling, that’s all.

Lubricant is important, especially if you have problems with self-lubrication (which as Moregasm points out, may or may not be related to your level of desire) or for anal play, so I would suggest doing some research aside from what Moregasm offers in its pages.

Thankfully, several resources are listed in the back of Moregasm, from “BDSM” to “Youth”, so you can look up more information on topics of interest. It’s a nice continuation of the educate-yourself, sex-positive attitude.

I would eat both of those things. Possibly at the same time.

Joseph

Mimi has done an excellent job of covering Moregasm. I will play the part of the downer and add one final note.

Remember that this book is written by a sex product retailer and they sell everything that they promote in the book. Now as Mimi said, Babeland has done a great job of not being too biased in their promotions, but the fact still remains that they have a vested interest in promoting the products they promote.

So look through its hip and easily approachable pages. Take away lots and lots and lots of sex positive information. Say “Hallelujah, Woot, or Hells Fucking Yes” (whichever you prefer) that a business like Babeland exists.

Just be sure to do a little independent research before buying anything. = )

And now…a tap dance!

The Naked Truth

Aesthetics: 4 out of 5 stars

Educational Value: 5 out of 5 stars

Quality of Writing: 5 out of 5 stars

Entertainment Value: 4.5 out of 5 stars

Overall: 4.5 out of 5 stars

If you’re hungry for more, check out their first book: Sex Toys 101

Getting Undressed is better when you tell everyone on the internet!

Now, onto our new GR’s – Vita and Zinaida! They were our winners from our What Are You Thankful For? Contest in which they won an Under The Bed Restraint System. After writing back to us about their experience, we decided they’d be perfect Guest Reviewers! You can find out more about them (and check out their sexy pictures) by clicking on their linked names above.

Enjoy!

- Mimi & Joseph

Under the Bed Restraint System (its on SALE!) provided for review by Babeland

Vita

I have to admit, I’d been secretly wanting these for awhile. But they were always too expensive, and a college budget doesn’t leave much room for splurges, especially the kind that don’t involve McDonald’s and bookstores (it’s true, I’m an English major). Needless to say, having the Under the Bed Restraints delivered to my door near the end of finals week was about the greatest care package I’ve gotten during four years at school. Once school responsibilities were out of the way, we set up—or more accurately, Z set up—the restraints. My job was keeping the kitten away from the dangling strings.

Once set up (installed seems like too intense a word for the easy process), I got to be the guinea pig, which I have to admit is one of my favorite roles. We first had the restraints coming around the head and foot of the bed, but quickly realized that setup didn’t do much in the way of foot restraint. I could still move out to the side, in toward each other, and even slide my knees up a little. Z easily fixed that by putting the two lower restraints around the sides of the bed. That changed the whole dynamic for me; now my legs were pulled out to the sides with minimal chance of changing that. The feeling of vulnerability was a totally new sensation, and quickly erased the disappointment I’d had over the feet part of the restraints.

I wanted to take advantage of the fact that each cuff could unbuckle from the restraint, and Z didn’t really like the look of my hands up and out to my sides. We clipped both of the upper cuffs (though all four are interchangeable) to one restraint, and went for the classic arms over the head look. Both of us preferred this, though at the moment my feet were free and any pulling I did on the wrist restraints slid the entire system slightly; that would be easily fixed by feet counterbalancing the pull.

Z got sneaky and added a blindfold, which only made the entire experiment more fun. I loved the combination of restricted sight along with restricted movement. The restraint system was an easy setup and more than effective once we figured out how we wanted to use it; I think one of its great advantages is its customizability. It’s now resting under the bed with the cuffs and straps tucked in, away from the kitten and visitors, and I have no doubt that it will be pulled back out quite consistently from here on out.

Zinaida

When we got the Under the Bed Restraint System, I must say I was a little surprised by the size of the box it came in (hence the picture). I’m not sure what I was expecting, but I figured it would either be heftier or take up a lot more room.

Well, after trying this baby out, I can say that it doesn’t need heft to do the job.
I love putting things together and attaching pieces to other pieces, so I have to say that the building nerd in me was a little disappointed that it came all in one piece—no assembly required. That did, however, make it easier to quickly set up (and quickly try out). The only thing I needed to do was adjust the size of the middle connector strap so that it wasn’t too long for the length of the bed.

That is one of the great things about this system. Everything is adjustable: the connector strap in the middle, each of the four straps that go to the cuffs, and the cuffs themselves. If you ever carried a backpack and noticed how those straps adjust, this is the exactly the same (although the cuffs adjust by Velcro).

Everything in this system is black, and all the hardware is silver. All in all, it’s a rather classy piece to have lurking between your mattress and box spring.

Aesthetically, the one drawback is that the cuffs are made out of a type of felt material—not exactly hardcore when viewed up close, but V loved the way they felt. However, because everything is detachable, your own cuffs could be added with no problem. Functionally, the drawback is that if all four cuffs aren’t cuffed to something (say just her hands are, but her feet are free), then it was easy for her to shift the entire system by pulling.

Great things about this system: The coolness factor – I mean, seriously. This thing is pretty badass. The customizability – As V said, this system can morph and fit the need for a lot of different uses. And the storage – as long as I’m near the bed, it’s always close. The best part is I don’t have to put it away when we’re done with it. Huzzah!

The Naked Truth

Aesthetics: 4.5 out of 5 stars

Functionality: 4.5 out of 5 stars

Craftsmanship: 5 out of 5 stars

Ease of installation: 5 out of 5 stars

Discretion: 5 out of 5 stars

Safety: 5 out of 5 stars

Overall: 5 out of 5 stars

Getting Undressed is better when you tell everyone on the internet!

Triple Crown Vibrating Beads provided for review by Babeland

Joseph

I am rather inexperienced with anal toys of all kinds. The only one that I’ve ever used other than the Bona Dea (what this product is called everywhere but Babeland) is the Flexi Felix. With that in mind, I do not endorse this product.

Although it feels pretty good when you actually get it in and all the beads are vibrating, it has some HUGE design flaws that prevent its comfortable use. But before I get into that, let’s talk about its construction.

The Bona Dea is a set of three beads with an independently controlled vibrating bullet in each bead. It is 6-1/2″ x 1-1/8″ and is made from 100% silicone which makes it silky smooth and easy to disinfect. The bullets are made from hard plastic, have a push-button on/off control and last for about 40 minutes. They take two LR41 (tiny watch) batteries a piece. These batteries will run you about $ .50 each if you need to replace them.

Now that you have an idea of just what it is, allow me to tear it to shreds. I have enough complaints that I am actually going to employ the list method of bitching. It is more scientific.

1. Those fucking vibrating bullets: They need TWO tiny little batteries to work and only last for 40 minutes. They are made of hard plastic which means that they cannot be disinfected. They twist apart so you can replace the aforementioned tiny batteries. That means there is a large opportunity for feces and bacteria to get inside of them and fester. The on/off control is placed in the same spot that you have to push in order to insert the Bona Dea. That makes accidentally turning them on and off inevitable.
2. The removal key: This is an included metal hook that is the only way to remove those fucking vibrating bullets. You must cram it down the hole that a bullet rests in, turn in 90 degrees, and then yank it out hard. Think about that for a moment. BEFORE you can clean this thing that has been in an ass, you must grab it, shove a metal thing down a small hole, then pull a hard plastic bullet that has also been in said ass out and it ain’t easy. You have to hold on to the beads to have enough leverage to pull the bullet out. F-U-N! Oh yeah, the key can scratch the beads or the bullets creating new crevices for bacteria.
3. The holes that the bullets go into: These serve as somewhat of a colon shovel. Enough said.
4. The linkage method of the beads: The beads are not linked in the middle like normal anal beads (0-0-0) but are linked at the edges (0_0_0). This both makes them harder to remove and makes the colon shovels more effective by stretching them upon removal. Sheesh.

Bona Dea FAIL!

It seems like it would be better to embed the bullets completely and make them rechargeable rather than the arduous and clumsily method chosen. Then the linking method could be properly done, the thing could be properly cleaned, and I wouldn’t be so infuriated.

Oooo-Sexy

Mimi

Wow… what to say… what to say…

He’s right. Pulling the Bona Dea from its stylish packaging, it looks impressive and exciting. Vibrating beads in my ass? That sounds fantastic. I’ll try anything twice.

I did try it – numerous times, actually. It does feel good once you insert them, accidentally turning one off in the process, and as they come out vibrating on an orgasmic wave. All of that is fine or great even.

Then cleaning them is terrible and not worth the previous pleasure. I repeat, Not Worth The Previous Pleasure. Even if you do it immediately, build up can occur inside the vibrating bullets, and it has for us as I’m sure it does for everyone. The poo will go where it will. Try getting it out of those little bullet crevices without damaging it. I dare you. Post a YouTube video. Convince me, please.

It won’t matter, though, because I’m totally throwing it out. Now.

The Naked Truth

Aesthetics: 5 out of 5 stars

Ease of Cleaning: 0 out of 5 stars

Retention: 5 out of 5 stars

Experience Level: 4 out of 5 stars

Overall: 1 out of 5 stars

Good looks will only take you so far…

Getting Undressed is better when you tell everyone on the internet!

365 Reasons to Have Sex 2010 Calendar provided for review by Babeland

Mimi

365 Reasons to Have Sex Calendar

It sounds silly, so bear with me here, but I’m really particular about calendars. I mean, you are committed to using this calendar for an entire year to suit all of your time organizational needs – and to look appealing. Or make you giggle.

The 365 Reasons to Have Sex Calendar that we received from Babeland for review is stylishly put together and as I flipped through its pages, it did in fact make me giggle a few times. I’m not even a fan of the page-a-day calendar (you cannot really plan ahead with these calendars), but I am still pretty jazzed to have this on our desk.

Why? Well, it’s amusing. For each day you get a reason to have sex, “prep for sexcess” – which includes “The Pickup [line]” and “The Wisdom” – and the whole right side of the page is devoted to communicating with your partner how bad you want it, where, when, whether he or she should bring anything, and some more incentive points (“The kids won’t hear us.”). I always enjoy an excuse to leave Joseph a dirty message. This calendar gives me an excuse and a place to do it. Every. Beautiful. Glorious. Day. Of. 2010.

Eff yes.

A few reasons I especially enjoy:

“I’m freshly shaved.”

“The supply closet is unlocked.”

“I want to break in my new car.”

“Simon says.”

Joseph

Mimi is right. It is really silly to be particular about calendars.

She’s also right that this one kicks ass.

The Naked Truth

Entertainment Value: 5 out of 5 stars

Aesthetics: 5 out of 5 stars

Functionality: 5 out of 5 stars

Ease of Cleaning: N/A

Overall: 5 out of 5 stars

“Pussy is a good resolution, too.” What does that even mean? My wife is so crass.

Getting Undressed is better when you tell everyone on the internet!

Our second contest was as large a success as the first was a failure. We had a veritable smorgasbord of comments to choose from and it was a very difficult choice. It took us almost two full episodes of Gilmore Girls (yes, we are huge dorks when not being super sexy) to pick our winner.

Without further ado, the winner of the Under the Bed Restraint System provided by Babeland is Jacqueline and she said:

I’m thankful for my incredible girlfriend and the very, very few friends at our hyper-conservative school who actually know she’s my girlfriend. I love that she complements me perfectly, from being the perfect top for me to being the perfect study partner to being the perfect roommate.

Sometimes it’s so scary trying to start this life when no one can even know about it, but she’s beyond willing to try everything with me (which is also fun – and the under the bed restraints would be AMAZING (especially given the grad school applications sucking our budget away)) and I still can’t believe I got her.

That was sappy enough. XD I’m also beyond thankful for our teensy tiny toy collection that just began in February. There’s so much exciting stuff still to explore in the future!

We just couldn’t pass up the opportunity to provide a discreet lesbian with a discreet bondage system. She’ll send us pictures of how appropriate it is if we’re lucky. (Hint, hint.)

A big thanks to everyone that entered! There were so many sexy and heart-warming things to be thankful for listed. It was truly a joy to read all of the honest and thoughtful comments. We hope that you’ve had the best Thanksgiving and that you all continue to find things to be thankful for in your lives in and out of the bedroom.

Getting Undressed is better when you tell everyone on the internet!