Bend over Beginner Kit provided for review by Babeland

Joseph

We live in a very strange culture. On one hand there is sex in nearly every advertising message that we see. And boy do we see them. It is estimated the average American is confronted with 3,000 advertising messages in some form per day.

Then on the other hand, our national stance on sex is the equivalent of sticking your fingers in your ears and shouting LALALLALALLALA! I am referring, of course, to the fact that a huge number of schools in this nation still teach abstinence only sex education. Because if you don’t teach kids about sex, they won’t have it!

This type of ignorance mixed with over stimulation often gives rise to confusing feelings and the proliferation of misguided concepts about sex and sexuality. Don’t tell me that you have never heard the ludicrous assertions “If I have sex on my period, I can’t get pregnant” or “Well, a blowjob is not sex so you can’t catch anything from giving one“ or the slightly more articulated “If a man receives anal sex, that makes him a fag.”

I grew up in this environment (and I imagine most of you did, too) and while I was able to get my hands on good solid information about sex and sexuality, I am still aware of the general climate in which I live and operate.

It is with that in mind that I announce our first ever review series: The Bend over Beginner kit from Tantus. The reason that we have chosen to do this in a series is because pegging is a very sensitive subject both where we live and at large. We are hoping that by going slowly with this subject, we can cover it more completely and address some of the issues that people have with it.

In this installation we are simply going to talk about the product itself.

The kit is two 100% silicone dildos (7/8″ x 4-1/2″ and 1-1/4″ x 5-1/2″), an adjustable (up to 60″) velvet harness with a pocket for the included bullet vibrator. It also has an interchangeable O-ring in case you want to use larger dildos.

As always with Tantus, the quality of all the materials seems very high and everything is easily cleanable. The harness is machine washable and the dildos can be sanitized via boiling or washing with bleach.

The next installment will cover how the harness fits, warm up and the use of the smaller dildos.

Do YOU have any experience pegging or being pegged? Share your experience with us. Either leave a comment or send us an email. Whichever you are more comfortable with.

Getting Undressed is better when you tell everyone on the internet!

The Anal Sex Position Guide provided by Eden Fantasys

Joseph

I found The Anal Sex Position Guide by Tristan Taormino to be fairly excellent.

There is not much explanation required for this one. Taormino likes her titles to be fairly telling of the subject matter and this book is no exception. It is an anal sex position guide.

As with all of Taormino’s work that I’ve seen, she prefaces the bulk of the book with information about responsible and respectful practices. This includes anatomical information, safe sex practices, a chapter about the importance of communication, a dispelling of common anal sex myths, and a good discussion about the importance of warm-up.

After she gives you the tools you need to succeed, Taormino jumps right into the position guide. She simply breaks down the positions with an explanation of how they are done, the pros and cons of each, and any variations to that position. Accompanying each position description is at least one picture of perfect, airbrushed people demonstrating the position and making faces that they think they would make if they were actually doing it. As you can probably tell by the snarky way in which I described them, perfect airbrushed people leave me with a bad taste in my mouth. However, I think they are fairly appropriate for this book. They are for demonstration purposes only so it is ok for them to be mannequins.

About the only issue that I have with this book (I have to have one problem with everything, it is in my nature) is the subtitle: The Best Positions for Easy, Exciting, Mind-Blowing Pleasure. I can agree that anal sex can be mind-blowing and is almost always exciting for one reason or another. However, I just can’t get behind (heh) calling it easy. Asses are finicky and everything has to be just right for anal sex to work and that ain’t easy. Taormino’s book certainly makes it easier, though.

Mimi

My experience with anal sex has been fairly standard in terms of positions – Missionary, Spooning, Doggie Style, Flying Doggie, and Horizontal Tailgate – with me almost always on the receiving end, so Tristan Taormino’s The Anal Sex Position Guide arrived here with a warm welcome. Sometimes a little extra nudge in the way of practical advice and men and women with bodies made of fantasy is what you need to try something new. And where ever you are in your anal sex escapades, The Anal Sex Position Guide is sure to offer you some useful information that is approachable and classy.

Similar to her writing in Opening Up, Taormino’s voice is friendly and casual, yet direct and clear in its attempt to guide. I feel like Taormino is someone I could talk to without feeling embarrassed or intimidated. It’s an excellent balance she creates in her writing. I love how she talks extensively about safe anal sex practices, lubricants, and toys for both men and women. This book will be most useful to someone who is new to anal sex, but it has other advantages for more experienced individuals. It’s also a great tool for instances where one individual in a couple wants to try something, but they don’t know how to bring it up or discuss it.

As you may or may not have picked up on, me and Joseph are gradually moving into anal play for him, which I have a little bit of experience with but hardly enough to count. Prior to our relationship, I was incredibly uncomfortable with the idea of using a strap-on and became squeamish at the mere thought of using one. It’s not me! I can’t tell what I’m doing! That sort of problem. Chapter 11 Anal Pleasure for Men & Strap-On Sex and Chapter 12 Positions for Strap-On Anal Sex were really useful and really comforting. I was open to the idea of using a strap-on with Joseph before reading The Anal Sex Position Guide, but now I am mentally, emotionally, and physically prepared to attempt this new and exciting activity in our lives.

I can sympathize with Joseph about the models, but I also think that, like Taormino mentioned in the book itself, anal sex is in a sense coming out of the shadows and when you’re presenting a concept that can be difficult for a lot of people, it’s important to try meeting them halfway. Glossy pages, sensual and warm colors, using a traditional perception of human physical beauty – these things make a book about putting things in your butt less… like putting things in your butt. I’m not ashamed of my actions – or my pleasure – and I don’t think I should be. I am a clean, healthy, self-respecting individual. Not everyone shares this perspective.

Also, I’m sure young, sexy, you’ll-never-look-like-this-and-you’ll-never-fuck-anyone-that-does-either models help books sell.  And I don’t mind Taormino making a buck. Or a lot of bucks.

In short, The Anal Sex Position Guide has offered me some needed confidence to pursue my interests. It has done so with style yet without pretention. Can’t argue with that.

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It’s good to have hobbies.

$19.99The Anal Sex Position Guide Book by Tristan Taormino Format: Paperback Publisher: Quiver Buy from EdenFantasys

Getting Undressed is better when you tell everyone on the internet!

Flexi Felix provided for us by Babeland

Joseph

The cute, 100% silicone caterpillar toy is by far the most comfortable thing that I have ever inserted into my anus. Granted, it is the only thing I have ever inserted into my anus but after having a look at some of the other toys on the market, I know the Flexi Felix made the process much easier than it could have been.

I had an understandable amount of anxiety about crossing that puckered line. There are all kinds of things for a heterosexual male in American society to worry about when considering anal play that is anything other than straight male on female. Stigmas abound. Our society does not encourage sexual acts that put men in an exposed or subordinate position. Men’s sexuality is about power and control. This message is constantly reinforced in both direct and indirect ways. I think that may be part of America’s problem with male homosexuality.

Ok, I’m done ranting about our society’s fucked up standards about sex. Perhaps one day we’ll make a whole post about it but for now, back to the Felix.

The Flexi Felix is a 12” (10” insertable length) set of anal beads manufactured by Fun Factory. It is 100% silky soft silicone and has a head with a smirking caterpillar face at its base. It is cute but not cutesy. It is by far the most approachable thing designed to go in one’s ass that I have ever seen.

Insertion was easy and comfortable with the exception of the stem in between the beads being a little too thin to get a good grip on. Fully inserted it is unobtrusive…almost to a fault. I couldn’t really feel it, which seems to defeat the purpose. It would, however make it easy to wear in all day which I could see as having some “I’m so naughty” appeal.

Removal during orgasm was not an altogether pleasant experience for me, but I don’t blame the product for that. I blame my inexperience with anal play. It is still a strange and kind of uncomfortable feeling and that prevents me from fully enjoying it.

Cleaning the Felix is really simple. Just drop it in a pot of boiling water for 10 to 15 minutes and you’re good to go.

As a genuine beginner, I cannot give this product a better endorsement. It is easy, approachable, and it has a good attitude!

Would you be smirking if you had Felix’s job?

Mimi

The Flexi Felix is my first anal bead type toy and with its 3/4″ to 1″ diameter beads, it’s very approachable for first-timers. Even if you’re entirely new to anal play, the Flexi Felix is as friendly to your ass as it looks. And it does look friendly, doesn’t it? Such a cute specimen of anal love. Offered in bright pink, light blue, and black silicone, the updated stylishness of the Flexi Felix adds to its approachability and ease of use. You just know when you’re holding it in your hands that this isn’t just another sketchy looking “string” of beads that you have to entrust to your tender and questionable anal orifice. Oh no. This is better, much better.

The silicone is incredibly smooth and relatively easy to insert, given how flexible it is (they don’t call it “Flexi” for nothin’), so you can play alone or with a partner without much – if any – discomfort or bent over frustration. Really. I had the whole strand in, tucked the caterpillar head under my panties, zipped up my shorts, washed my hands, and came back out into the living room within just a few minutes. You won’t even need to pause your movie, or worry about your tea getting cold.

Left in for a few hours, Flexi Felix feels pretty good. It creates a whole other meaning in my mind to the phrase, “dirty little secret”. And I am certainly a girl who likes her secrets. However, it is the experience of this reviewer that the Flexi Felix is hands down at its absolute best when pulled out during orgasm. This toy is perfect when you want a little extra OMFG without a whole lot of effort, time, or lube.

As you can imagine, this “easy as cake” quality can become rather… boring. Don’t get me wrong. I appreciate “easy” when I come across it, which is why I still enjoy the Flexi Felix and will happily let it occupy a space in my toy box. Still, I will always favor a more versatile toy over a one hit wonder. It’s just my nature. If you function similarly, you might want to shop around a bit. (I know that Babeland in particular offers some other anal toys that are challenging/fun/practical.)

And to top it all off, the Flexi Felix is that, since it is silicone, you can disinfect it by boiling it for 10-15 minutes, putting it in the top rack of your dishwasher, or with soap and water. (I prefer boiling.) Remember to use a water-based lubricant with this toy. It will last you a long time if you take care of it.

Unwinding after a long day of putting up with other people’s shit.

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Getting Undressed is better when you tell everyone on the internet!