Undressed Reviews

Sep 17 2009

Reading Lost Girls HNT

By Undressed and has no comments yet.

Getting Undressed is better when you tell everyone on the internet!

Categories: HNT

Tags: adult comic, Alan Moore, HNT, Lost Girls

Sep 16 2009

Fetish Pleasure Pad

By Undressed and has 14 comments.

Fetish Pleasure Pad provided by Tabu Toys

Joseph

The Fetish Pleasure Pad is another sex toy that is technically a good idea but fails in application. Let me describe it as simply as I can. It is a soft pad with four straps and a hole in the middle. It seems like it would be frustrating to use any other dildos than the ones included because the bases would need to be of a specific size to fit through the hole. Of course, when I say “use” I mean strap said dildo wielding pad to a chair, bench, motorcycle, or whatever kind of sturdy object that you can and have fun.

Pipedream (the manufacturer) is kind enough to include two dongs (the term they use), lube and toy cleaner sample, and a blindfold in the box with the pleasure pad. The dongs are made of latex rubber and stink like you would not believe. Imagine having a condom inside your olfactory glands and then you may begin to understand. Aside from reeking, one of the dongs is neon blue and “realistic”. The other is smaller, slimmer, and black. Both of them have very effective suction cups and will hang from a wall for days. I know that bit of information is not directly useful but I felt it was worth mentioning.

The lube is very thin but did not dry up too quickly during intercourse and seemed to work pretty well for Mimi on the dongs. We haven’t yet used the toy cleaner, so I can’t speak to how well it works.

I can’t imagine what the purpose of including a blindfold with this product could possibly be. In fact, it seems a little dangerous to me. You strap the pad to a chair, put the blindfold on, and then sexily stub your toe. Awesome.

As far as the product in use…it did not look like Mimi enjoyed it a great deal, but I’ll let her tell you about that.

It is someone’s job to design the labels of these. Think about that.

Mimi

The Shower Smoothy Dong and the Lifelike Dong that came with the Please Pad butchered any fantasy I had about this toy being sexually satisfying. It’s not because the Lifelike Dong is blue or that they’re both floppy rubber, although the material itself helped. They killed it because they smell like offensively cheap floral soap mixed with latex. Can you imagine wanting to put that inside your body?

And I don’t mean a faint smell that you only notice if you press your nose against the toy. Our bathroom, where the toys currently live, smells like those Dongs. It’s a hell of a time to run out of incense, let me tell you.

The pad itself is easy to install and clean, especially if you have a standing shower or if you’re so accustomed to washing items by hand that you could do it in your sleep. If you don’t have space to let it dry out conveniently (and discreetly), that may be reason enough not to purchase this item. There would be no mistaking what this is on a clothes line.

The suction cups, although amusing to childish hooligans like us (see photo of Dong stuck to bathroom mirror), are actually practical – they help keep the Dongs in place while you’re using them. If you can get into the Pleasure Pad, you definitely don’t want it moving on you.

Due to this simplistic design approach, I can see why someone might really enjoy the Pleasure Pad. Sure, when I was a little girl, I used to love straddling the arm of chairs, then rocking back and forth. I get the idea. But I still didn’t like this toy. Aside from having to surpass a psychological hurdle against putting a foul smelling object inside my body, the Pleasure Pad mostly felt awkward and inefficient.

We joked almost the whole time, first about the totally arbitrary “free” black eye mask, then about the positions I had to assume just for the Lifelike Dong to hit my g-spot. The Lifelike Dong is not really firm enough, and that combined with humping a wooden stool/piano bench/chair (i.e., something hard) equates to fairly high percentage of frustration. The Shower Smoothy Dong felt a little more than decent in my butt…

I guess that’s representative of my whole point, though. The Pleasure Pad is remarkably, amazingly okay. At best. Really it just made me want to attack Joseph and get it done proper. So the Pleasure Pad did create a memorable experience between myself and my fiancé, but not in the way intended.

It is hard to come up with picture ideas for every product, ok? Get off our back!

The Naked Truth:

Intensity:

Volume: N/A

Aesthetic design:

Versatility:

Ease of cleaning:

Overall:

Getting Undressed is better when you tell everyone on the internet!

Categories: Reviews

Tags: blindfold, dildo, lube, masturbation, rubber, sex toy, Tabu Toys, video

Sep 16 2009

Pleasurists #46

By Undressed and has no comments yet.

body

via allinone

Pleasurists is a round-up of the adult product and sex toy reviews that came out in the last seven days from bloggers all around the sex blogosphere. Did you miss Pleasurists #45? Read it all here. Do you have a review for Pleasurists #47? Submit it here before Sunday September 20th at 11:59pm PDT. Please re-post this list on your own blog if listed.

Want to win some free swag? All you’ve got to do is enter.

Contest: Win an Njoy Pure Wand! Deadline: September 16th, 2009 at Midnight Eastern.
Nipplecharms.com Giveaway! Deadline: September 19, 2009 Midnight CST.
Giveaway: Hard Love and How to Fuck in High Heels Deadline: September 25th.
Top Five Tuesday – Win 1000 FREE Porn Minutes Deadline: Tuesday September 29th.

Madame Editrix

Scarlet Lotus St. Syr

Editor’s Pick

G-Twist by Shanna Germain

The battery housing is slightly confusing — you have to press the sides in really hard in order to open it (I struggled with it for so long, I thought about asking my neighbor for help, but since I’ve not said anything more to him than “hello” and “oh, it’s really okay that your dog barked all night long, no worries,” I figured that showing up at his doorstep with a pseudo-cock, a couple of batteries and a helpless look wasn’t the world’s best idea).

Editor’s Note: While there have been a lot of G-Twist reviews lately from all the new GoodVibes Brand Ambassadors I think this one far surpasses the others (including my own). Not to say the others are bad, perish the thought, but just because this one actually made me smile at times and even chuckle at others.

On to the reviews…

Vibrators