The Tenga Lip Service: The best 15 dollars you’ll ever throw out.

Masturbation sleeves: they’re those ridiculous-looking tubes that, as a man, I’m a bit wary of sticking myself inside of. Sure they might take up an entire shelf at your local sex store, but do I really want to put my dick inside of a flashlight? How about an ultra-realistic looking set of disembodied hips or a strange, day-glo cylinder made out of materials with names right out of a science fiction novel? Call me a old fashioned, but sometimes a hand just feels more familiar. With this in mind, I was a bit wary upon seeing the “Tenga Lip Service” for the first time.

On one hand, it’s a masturbation sleeve. This means that I’ll inevitably be placing my manhood in the rubbery grasp of the cold and unnatural. But, on the other hand, this one had some promise. First, it was engineered and created in Japan, the same adult novelty culture that gave us tentacle porn and that strange stuff that turns water into goo; they know their stuff. Second, the “cup” was severely lacking any of the ridiculousness which inspired my original fear of masturbation sleeves, this one looked more like a fancy bottle of body wash or conditioner– I had a greater risk of being labeled as having expensive tastes than being a pervert. But, sophisticated grooming products aside, I was genuinely excited to try out the “Lip Service” (also known as the Deep Throat Cup) and put it through its paces. Before we get to that however, I should explain a bit about the Tenga in the first place.

Engineered in Japan by a former mechanic, the Lip Service comprises only one of a growing number of pre-packaged, “onacups” with names like “Rolling-head Cup” and “Soft Tube Cup” which, as you may have inferred, offer different types of stimulations. In particular, the Lip Service offers a unique method of suction that utilizes a small hole in one end of the cup to create a vacuum around the soft, jelly sleeve inside. Basically, you stick yourself in the cup to push the air around the sleeve out of the hole. Then, while covering the hole, you withdraw your penis from the cup and the thin jelly material hugs the skin close while providing suction. Pretty cool, right?

I’d have to see if it delivered on its promise.

Did it ever.

Removing the Lip Service (which I’ll just refer to as LS from now on,) from its package, unwrapping the protective covering and uncapping the business end of the diminutive cup, I was greeted with this:

A seemingly endless abyss of white jelly lay before me, coated in thick, slippery lube. I felt loved, knowing that there was a machine somewhere making sure that I didn’t have to lube up my LS before having at it. Taking a gulp, I inched myself into the LS, taking in the sensations as I heard a loud flatulating noise resonate around my penis. What had I done? Had I upset the Tenga somehow? Was I being punished by the masturbation gods for using such a plain looking masturbation sleeve? No, I just hadn’t removed the sticker on top! Right then, take two.

(Yeah, you’re going to want to take that sticker off before getting down to business.)

Sliding in again, a soft “pssht” sound replaced the earlier noise of the blocked hole and I could feel the material pushing against my penis. Now, I’m not a large guy by any means, but I could easily fill the LS with my overwhelming average-ness. Fear not however, they make larger versions for the XL guys out there. For me however, the normal Tenga did just fine and, placing my fingers over the little hole at the other end of the LS, I began to pump away. An astounding 30 seconds later, I collapsed on my bed in the throes of La Petite Mort, toes still curled from the experience.

Thirty seconds. Seriously.

Maybe it was the inhuman geometry of the inner sleeve that did it, perhaps it was the sucking sensation that drew the little ridges tight against my cock whenever I slipped out, but I have never climaxed so quickly in my life. In this respect, I’d give the Lip Service seven thumbs up if I could. The suction works and it works well, as evidenced by the very audible “slurp” that accompanied every thrust. That’s right, it slurps. Tenga claims that this adds to the realistic blowjob ambiance, but it can certainly be a detractor if you’re looking to be discreet about it. Luckily, it also makes a great aid without the suction, as evidenced by several longer follow-up tests over the course of the next week… Often several at a time.

As for whether or not it actually feels like a blowjob, that’s a tricky one. The different bumps and stimulation-enhancing bits on the inside certainly stimulate as much as a human mouth, perhaps even more in my case, but after a while you begin to notice the very real lack of life in the little plastic widget quickly engulfing your manhood. As a fan of blowjobs and the Tenga both, I’d have to say that in a pinch, the LS will more than do the job.

Any product that produces results this pleasurable wouldn’t be without its little niggles though, right? You’re correct! The LS does have a small list of issues, both large and small. First, the entire Tenga line is disposable. In that, you throw it out after one use. Like a one night stand, but… plastic. It’s possible to wash the Tenga with a bit of water and antibacterial soap, but the company doesn’t recommend it and neither do I. If you follow the recommendations of the company and dispose of your Tenga after you use it, you’re looking at around 15 bucks each time you’re feeling a bit randy. Now, I haven’t tried sticking my dick in caviar or saffron, but 15.00 to insert yourself into something plastic for a few minutes and then throw away? It seems like a waste of money to me, and that’s where Tenga failed to win me over completely. Perhaps Tenga’s reusable onahole, the Flip-Hole, would be a better choice for the budget-conscious masturbator. As for the disposal itself, the Tenga is completely recyclable, so it’s entirely possible to get yer jollies and freak out the guys at the recycling center at the same time. Woo!

Second, the noise can get quite loud at times—fine if you live alone, not so fine if you don’t. Finally, I found that the sensations delivered by the LS depended more on my arousal. When I wasn’t particularly horny, the sensations felt a little bland and lifeless, although it still did the job. When I was really horny however? It was as if every inch of my cock could feel what was happening. Bland rubbery “hole” or uber-engineered orgasm extracting device, you’re likely to fall somewhere between the two sentiments.

In closing, the Tenga can be likened to a gourmet meal on plastic tableware: perfectly prepared and ultimately satisfying, but also cheap and utterly disposable.

The Naked Truth

I have been reading your review/blog site and is quite interesting.  I have a question. What would you recommend: pjur MY sexual enhancers, K-Y INTENSE Arousal Gel for Her and Durex Play Utopia Female Arousal Gel?

I have used Durex and I really really like it, but I am not sure what [to] buy next–KY or pjur.  I have used for years pjur original and eros and they are both fantastic.

Thanks!  And I am sorry if you don’t usually answer this kind of emails.  It can end up being a post

Warm regards,

C

Dear C,

First of all, thanks for reading our blog! We appreciate it a lot. You can email me or Joseph anytime with questions. This is becoming a post ’cause no one else asked me anything. Yay!

Secondly, onto the lube. I have never used a “sexual enhancement”-esque lube other than the flavored sort, so I can’t speak about any of your options from experience. Pjur is a good brand for lube, so of the three I would probably choose that one on account of familiarity and pre-established trust. I’ve used the brands KY and Durex in the past, but they were not particularly great for me.

However, something to bear in mind with lube is that everyone’s body functions differently and thus has different requirements. I don’t self-lubricate very well, so my body needs a lube that lasts long without tackiness. Plus, a few of my favourite toys are silicone, so I can’t use silicone-based lube with them and must be mindful of that when purchasing lube.  Maybe those aren’t concerns of yours, but I’m sure there are other priorities you have for lube.

Maximus, Liquid Silk, Slippery Stuff Gel, pjur, and Babeland are brands I have used in the past with noteworthy results (i.e., I can actually remember them).

Good luck with your lube shopping! If you have any other questions, feel free to send me another email or respond directly in this post. Whatever your preference.

- Mimi

How’s Joseph’s father doing, if you don’t mind me asking?!

Why don’t you use formspring? Oops thats two questions.

- anonymous

Dear Anonymous person who can count,

Joseph’s father is doing much better! I won’t get into specifics – you understand, right? – but the situation is less dire for him. We should be able to begin posting again soon, even if we just start with our Guest Reviewers.

We don’t use Formspring because we don’t see the point, to be blunt. I mean, our readers can ask us anything via email, Facebook, or Tumblr. We already have those forums in place so there really isn’t much reason to open another account.  I spend enough time at the computer, thanks.

But if you want to tie me to this chair (and I know some of you do), you can send me some more questions, comments, complaints, etc. at mimi@undressedreviews.com or undressedreviews@gmail.com. Also, Gmail chat is fun on a bun and will definitely keep me trapped here for-ev-er. Sandlot style.

Thanks for your patience!

- Mimi

Valentine’s Day is fast approaching and we have the perfect gift for your sweetie (s).

Handmade raunchy Valentine’s Day Cards!

They are $2 only (just like the chips) and will get you way more than $2 in bootie!

The chips are full of processed crap. Our cards are full of love.

Just in case you are a visual or auditory learner, we’ll include this video reminder:

No, seriously…buy some cards.

Hello, lover!

Seriously, if I could, I would walk around all day with this little beauty vibrating away in my underwear. People may start to wonder why my crotch is buzzing, but what they don’t know can’t hurt ‘em! Before I dedicate a shrine to the LAYAspot, let me go over why it is so awesome.

Fun Factory’s packaging is gorgeous. There are two flaps at the back(?) of the box that close together with magnets. The picture on the box just depicts the LAYAspot and Fun Factory’s tagline: ‘love yourself!’. The other side of the box just showcases the vibrator. No tacky, ridiculous rubbish here. Fun Factory is all class, baby (and magnets).

With the LAYAspot you get a little booklet in a ton of different languages and a small sachet of lube. I received Fun Factory’s Bodyfluid, which is their silicone-based lubricant, but others have received Toyfluid, their water-based lubricant.

Rest assured though, either silicone or water-based lube will do fine. The LAYAspot is made mostly from Elastomed, which I believe is similar in properties to silicone, but can be used with silicone lubricant. However, elastomed can not be sterillised, so either use this solo, with a condom, or with partners that you are fluid-bonded with.

It is also partially plastic. The battery cap, an area near the buttons and the middle portion of the bottom of the vibrator are the only parts in plastic. This middle portion is the one that comes into contact with or close to your clit, but it is not hard and uncomfortable.

The elastomed portions of mine smell kind of weird. I’ve washed it many times and I swear it came out of the package smelling like this. Its not offensive or really pungent, but its sort of play-doh like. I think that mine’s just an anomaly though.

The LAYAspot takes two AAA batteries, and can fit rechargeable AAAs. Its power is enough to get most people off, but not enough for the power queens or those with clits of steel. It is rather quiet and can not be heard through a closed door at its highest vibration.

There are 8 steadily increasing vibration patterns and 3 pulsation patterns. To get to the pulsation patterns just keep pressing the + button until the highest steady vibration is reached and press the + once more. To get back to the steady vibrations, just press – and you’ll go back to the highest steady vibration. The buttons sometimes have to be pressed quite hard though.

Its vibrations are more the deep and rumbly type, and not really buzzy at all. This can either be a plus or a con depending on what vibrations you prefer.

The LAYAspot has no O ring to keep it waterproof but I don’t believe it to be entirely splashproof either. When I first washed it (under the sink) very carefully, I still found water inside the battery cap. It wasn’t a lot, but I’d keep this vibe away from water just in case. To clean it I would recommend a damp cloth, wipes or water if you’re not as clumsy as I am and won’t get it into the battery cap. Do not boil the LAYAspot or run it through the dishwasher, no matter how titillating that may look.

This toy is very ergonomic in design and can be held easily in different ways to get the type of stimulation you prefer. For those of you that get off with pressure (high-five!) the LAYAspot is your sex toy. The plastic portion that comes into contact with the clit is a little concaved so it would be rather difficult to hurt your clit even with massive amounts of pressure. It can stimulate both the labia and the clitoris at the same time, so its good times all round!

The orgasms I get from the LAYAspot are ok, but they’re not amazing. The LAYAspot is like my ol’ reliable vibe. I know I will get off while using it, and my body can be very picky. If you already own luxury vibes or the Hitachi Magic Wand the LAYAspot probably won’t blow you away. Nonetheless, this is my favourite vibrator because I can get off with just it alone. And I love that.

The Naked Truth

Aesthetics: 4 out of 5 stars

Intensity: 3 out of 5 stars

Volume: 3 out of 5 stars

Ease of Cleaning: 2.5 out of 5 stars

Functionality: 4 out of 5 stars

Overall: 4 out of 5 stars

Of course it can also be used in case of zombie Teddys...

Basic breathe-easy ball gag provided for review by Eden Fantasys

Joseph

This is my first experience with a manufactured gag. I mean, I can’t say that it is my first experience with a gag because arguably anything that can be crammed in a mouth is a gag and I’ve had so many things crammed in my mouth….you don’t even know.

As first experiences go, it was a pretty great one. I opened this product up and popped it in my mouth right out of the bag (lets hope the person that put it in there washed their hands) because I wanted to see if it really was easy to breathe through. It is! Though after some heavy breathing it gets a bit…slobbery but as anyone that has every played a wind instrument knows, there is really no way around that.

Because the ball is made from 100% silicone, it is really easy to clean and phthalates free which are both great things. If you can’t tell from the pictures, the nylon straps are held onto the side of the ball via metal snaps and there is an adjustable clasp closure. The ball itself is 2” long by 1 ¾” wide with 1 ¼” insertable length. For reference…it is slightly larger than a ping pong ball.

The clasp is the only thing about this product that I don’t like. It has to be threaded each time the gag is put on which makes it very easily (unavoidably) adjustable, but can be somewhat annoying and cumbersome. My thinking is that the only reason one would need an enclosure type that needs to be adjusted every single time is if you are with several different partners quite frequently. For someone using it on the same person most of the time, it seems like a clasp like on a bike helmet or Timbuk 2 messenger bag would be easier to manage. You’d have to adjust it once and then you could just clip it shut.

You're a bad girl, shut u-oh..hold on...effing strap...damn it...THERE. Shit.

That is a relatively small complaint though. This is still a very well made and easy to use product.

Mimi

I have used cloth for gags in the past, but generally the consensus amongst myself and lovers has been to let me have free use of my mouth. It may have something to do with how much I enjoy kissing and biting, or my propensity for being loud and saying barely coherent things (can you say, “ego boost”?). I don’t know, and I don’t really care. However, I do enjoy having things put into my mouth – forcefully (though consensual) or not – and I have long wanted to try a ball gag.

So why has it taken this long to get my hands on one? No, it’s not because I’m a starving artist in training. It’s because I have problems with my jaw, which can make chewing, blowing dick, or dentist visits painful. I do all of these things anyway, so of course trying out a ball gag was an option, it was just a matter of finding the right one to start with. My poor, spoiled little bitch mouth needs to take a baby step, not a leap.

And baby step we did! The Basic Breathe-Easy ball gag is not very large, comfortable, and easy to use. Oh, and it doesn’t smell or taste bad. It’ll stay that way provided that you clean it properly, which should be easy peasy because the gag itself is silicone. If you’ve been reading our reviews, you know that silicone is amazingly easy to clean – boil it for about 10 minutes or put it in your dishwasher’s top rack without soap. As for the nylon, metal, and plastic straps that you may get saliva on, wash with with soap and hot water in the sink. No big deal.

The reason I’m telling you all of this personal information is because I’d like you to understand that if you’re coming from a similar perspective, for whatever reason, then this ball gag is probably your perfect gateway gag. Beginners, mild BDSM-ers, TMJ-ers, and those with sensitive gag reflexes or prone to colds and congestion. No excuses! Gag yourself before I harmless internet threat all over you! Raawwwwwww!!!!

The Naked Truth

Aesthetics: 4 out of 5 stars

Functionality: 5 out of 5 stars

Craftsmanship: 5 out of 5 stars

Ease of Installation: 3.5 out of 5 stars

Discretion: N/A

Safety: 5 out of 5 stars

Overall: 4.5 out of 5 stars

Also, you can be a clown. Everybody loves clowns. Like John Wayne Gacy, Jr.

In the Looking Glass by PerryGallagher

Pleasurists is a round-up of the adult product and sex toy reviews that came out in the last seven days. For updates and information follow our RSS Feed and Twitter.

Did you miss Pleasurists #62? Read it all here. Do you have a review for Pleasurists #64? Be sure to read our submission guidelines and then you can use our submission form and submit it before Sunday February 7th at 11:59pm PST.

Want to win some free swag? All you’ve got to do is enter.

• Mia for You-a! Viva La Vulva! Deadline: February 6th.
• Jimmyjane for Her, LELO for Him Deadline: February 7th @ 11:59pm.
• Courtney Trouble Week! Deadline: Daily at midnight until February 8th.
• Sportsheets Interview Contest Deadline: February 9th.
• Cupid’s Fun Factory Contest Deadline: February 10th @ 11:59pm.
• Vagazzle Your VaJayJay! Deadline: February 13th.
• Now’s Your Chance for a Second Valentine’s Day! Deadline: February 15th @ 11:00 am CST.
• Porn & Fleshlights Deadline: On Saturday nights each week in February.

Looking for sexy posts other than reviews?

e[lust] #6

Editor’s Pick

• The Forked Tongue by Sweet Tart

It is a short book: 124 pages, large font, wide spacing, maybe 30,000 words in total. And yet, unlike other books on similar topics, it does not feel like there is too little material. Rather, that Flagg is the master of brevity and precision. His is the pert aphorism, the cutting quote. He wields words like a surgeon wields a scalpel. As, indeed, he should: his topic is the use of language.

Note: Not only does Sweet Tart do a wonderful job introducing a book to us in a well-written and concise manner (in perfect harmony with the book itself it seems) but The Forked Tongue sounds absolutely intriguing and slightly disturbing. They are both definitely worth a read!

Editrix

Scarlet Lotus St. Syr

On to the reviews…

Vibrators

• Xtreme Pack Mini G-Spot Bullet by Undressed Reviews
• Hitachi Magic Wand by Mistress Kay
• SnugglePuss by Sarahbear
• Kiwi by True Pleasures
• Jenna’s Double Play by Dr. Ruthie
• Mystic Wand by Darling Dove
• Onye Fleur by Scintillectual
• Lucid Curves #21 by KissMyKitty
• Baby Bug by Sundae
• Lina by Sammi
• Better than Chocolate by Carrie Ann
• Bcurious by Epiphora
• Kokeshi Boy by Dani Darling
• Rock Chick by Susan Hansen
• Blue Bird Bullet by Shay
• LELO Mia by Pretty Power Tools
• Love Lips Lipstick by Pretty Power Tools
• Vibratex Mystic Wand by Joanna Cake

Dildos

• Vixen Creations Buck by Kaijah
• LELO Ella by Carrie Ann
• Njoy Pure Wand by Mistress Kay
• Njoy Pure Wand by Sarahbear
• Allegro by Carrie Ann

Anal Toys

• Bend Over Beginner by Undressed Reviews
• Pure Plug by Carrie Ann

Toys for Cocks

• Tera Patrick Fleshlight (Twista) by Epiphora
• Fleshlight Original Mouth by Tales from the Porn Store

Lube, Massage Oil, Bath Stuff, & etc.

• RocketBalm: For His Pleasure by Dr. Ruthie
• Shunga Secret Garden by Carrie Ann

BDSM/Fetish

• Ball Gag with Attached Dildo by Mistress Kay
• Fulfill a Fantasy Flogger by Mistress Kay
• Purple Fur Lined Restraints by Mistress Kay
• Chicago Electric 440lb/880lb Electric Hoist by BDGuy

Adult Books & Games

• Smart Girl’s Guide to the G-Spot & Orchid G Combo by Sammi
• Fantasies by Jack Goldstien

Adult Movies/Porn

• Belladonna’s Strapped Dykes by Epiphora
• Behind the Red Door by Undressed Reviews
• Alone for You by Garnet Joyce
• Thin Line Between Art and Sex by J.D. Bauchery
• On the Lawn by The Porn Librarian
• The 8th Day (Disc 1) by FrzKey
• Crash Pad Series – Episode 32: Cash & Stella by J.D. Bauchery
• Alpine Adventure by FrzKey

Miscellaneous

• Eat Whatever Mints by True Pleasures
• Tri-Pod Hitachi Attachment by Mistress Kay
• P-Style by Wilhelmina Wang
• Sex Sling by HotMoviesForHer Sex Toy Crew
• 365 Reasons To Have Sex by Cinnamon

Orchid G + Smart Girl’s Guide to the G-spot provided for review by Babeland

Zinaida

To begin with, I just want to say that on a whole, I haven’t been entirely interested in G-spot toys, or actually, the G-spot. This could be for a couple of reasons: 1) I’m fairly a newbie when it comes to sex, so I’m still completely enamored by the clit, or 2) While I know a ton about the G-spot, I’ve never really been pushed to try it—sometimes I have a hard time changing from something that’s tried and true. So, I was pretty excited to receive the Orchid G and The Smart Girl’s Guide to G-spot combo.

Opening the package for the vibrator though, the only thing I could think was, “Shit, this thing is huge!” I’m not gonna lie, I was rather intimidated by it. Its widest point is 1-3/8”, and it’s barely smaller than a large egg, as you can tell by the picture. The vibrations in this baby are hella strong though. You turn on the vibrator by twisting the bottom, and it increases in intensity the more you twist. The Orchid G on low is comparable to the Babeland Bullet on high. When V was using it for clit stimulation, I was straddling her shin, and I could feel the vibrations from her leg bone (which could make for some interesting play).

Overall though, I couldn’t get the vibe in. Ok, ok—I didn’t even TRY to get the vibe in. As I was trying and it got close, I tensed up so much I knew it was going to be hopeless. Wondering if other people had the same problem, I went on the Babeland site and looked at reviews for the Orchid G, and sure enough there were a small handful of people who said that it was too big for insertion, very hard (it’s made out of plastic), or awkward. It is waterproof though, which is always great bonus in a toy.

The partner to this combo, The Smart Girl’s Guide to the G-spot by Violet Blue, is an extremely educational book. For those who don’t know a lot about the G-spot and would like to, this book would be a great place to start. She outlines female anatomy, finding the G-spot and what to do with it, tips for talking about it with a partner, and female ejaculation. The book is an easy read, and it’s nice having lots of G-spot information in one place. The very end also has an index of online shopping, resources, recommended reading, and safe sex information.

However, I did have a couple of problems with the book:

1. There are four porn interludes written by erotica writer Alison Tyler. Now, I could go off on how these stories were filled with your classic cheesy porn type of writing, or how some of them gave off an anti-feminist air, but I won’t. I will say, however, that these stories seemed like propaganda. They were simply a reiteration in story form of what Violet Blue had already written, and that plus the bad writing were off-putting to me.

2. Toward the end of the book, the G-spot almost disappears completely. Instead, the writing begins to focus on anal sex, clit stimulation, and BDSM. But, more on that later.

Overall, I do think that this is a good combo set. The vibrator seems great; my body just needs a smaller one. The book is very informative, but I felt like by the end of it I should have wanted to explore G-spot stimulation. Instead, I’m still not that interested in trying it out yet.

Vita

Before I say anything else, I think Babeland has a great idea in selling these two together; I’m all for combo sets that save you money. However, this one, to me, had two major flaws.

As a girl who only wears junior size tampons, I was a little startled by the Orchid G. Things never look quite as big online as they do in real life. This was the cause of Flaw #1: the Orchid G proved too big for little me, even with lube. As a clitoral vibrator, it’s great; it’s actually the strongest of all my toys (yes, everything I own is still battery-operated), and that was a fun discovery. Its Very Big Head felt great against me, and the twist at the bottom to control it was convenient enough. That same Very Big Head, though, has yet to fit where the book said I should put it. This seems like a shame, since the combination of strong vibrations and Very Big Head promises to be delightful…one day.

Now, onto the book. I’ve heard about it before but never had the chance to read it; g-spots intrigue me but I’m mostly an external stimulation kind of girl. Nonetheless, I found the first half of the book full of information that made me a little bit more curious than I had been. The writing style occasionally can be too cutesy for my taste, but the background, anatomy lesson, and general informative tidbits were useful and interesting. I have two major qualms with this book, however, that I’m adding up to make Flaw #2.

First, an entire chapter as well as parts of other chapters felt completely unnecessary and unrelated, like Z mentioned. Chapter 6, entitled “faster, deeper, more!”, was supposedly about ways to enhance g-spot play; specifically, she went into detail about anal sex, oral sex, and power play. And she did indeed go into detail: she covered the basics of anal, plugged her book The Ultimate Guide to Cunnilingus, and gave a variety of S/M options that seemed likely to scare off a beginner. In each section was a brief reference to how playing with the g-spot was great in addition to these tactics, but it felt tacked on, and I didn’t need pages on “Getting Started with Anal Penetration” to tell me that.

Second, there was erotica. Don’t get me wrong – I love erotica, when it’s well written and I’m in the perfect mood to enjoy it. But when I’m halfway through learning about my g-spot and I’m hesitant about the entire ordeal, a short story that feels like thinly veiled propaganda (to steal Z’s analogy) isn’t going to do anybody any good. I know it’s impossible to please everyone when it comes to erotica, but I feel like the chances aren’t in Violet Blue’s favor. Not only did the stories come across as didactic and/or forced, but they were unnecessary. I almost didn’t read the last two, but I’m glad I did, because they introduced me to great phrases like “to collect a fresh dose of your honeyed juices” and “I’m going to take you even further—to a tropical island called ‘coming together’”—not really what I cared about in an otherwise educational read.

All that said, there was a good deal of information in the book, and I wouldn’t by any means discount it. I wasn’t as huge a fan as I expected to be, but it’s certainly not a bad book. I love the idea of packaging it together with a vibrator to make the exploration that Violet Blue talks about at length convenient and easy, but at least for us, this combination didn’t do it. Now, if there were vibrator or size options for the combo, that could come closer to doing the trick. In the meantime, though, I’m quickly becoming a fan of the Orchid G for clit stimulation.

The Naked Truth

Orchid G

Aesthetics: 4 out of 5 stars

Intensity: 4 out of 5 stars

Volume: 3.5 out of 5 stars

Ease of Cleaning: 5 out of 5 stars

Functionality: 5 out of 5 stars (well, for external use)

Overall: 4 out of 5 stars

The Smart Girl’s Guide to the G-spot

Aesthetics: 5 out of 5 stars

Educational Value: 5 out of 5 stars

Quality of Writing: 3 out of 5 stars

Entertainment Value: 2 out of 5 stars

Overall: 3.5 out of 5 stars

Awww, what a cute pussy.

We had a total of three people enter our Valentine’s Day card giveaway. THREE!

Just because the grand prize was worth $6…that’s no reason to ignore free handmade cards. Boo. Boo all over you.

Now, in an entirely different tone of voice, I’ll thank and congratulate our winners.

The winners are:

1st prize – Kayla and Scintillectual tied for it. Subsequently they will both be receiving three Ultra Premium handmade Valentine’s day cards and a unique haiku each.

2nd prize – Kathyrn wins one of our Ultra Premium handmade Valentine’s day cards and a unique small drawing.

Thank you three for entering. We sincerely wish you the bes VD ever!

Every one else:

Check out our line of handmade Valentine’s day cards and maybe get one for your sweetie (s).